Tarnished Gosling
by dinkadot
Summary: Meet Edward owner of Club Volturi. His world turned upside down by beauty Bella Swan. Can Edward help Bella Heal or will she forever be tarnished? Lemons ExB/RxE/JxA
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**This is a collaboration between Becky Young and myself. This is our first story here at FF, thank you in advance for those of you that read, review and alert. We hope that you enjoy this story, we are definately having fun writting it.**

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Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 1: Roaming dicks and Fuckwads

Tonight has gone like every other night that we had at the club. I snub out my smoke and look at the stack of papers that are staring at me like a mocking troll begging me to give it my attention. I did not want to deal with this shit. Having to replace a good portion of my staff is really starting to get on my last nerve. Aro, my idiot of a general manager, has managed to not only offend, but also has intimidated all of the fuckhot women that are working here at Volturi. Aro is a great general manager, he is a lot crass at times but he knows how to run a nightclub I will give him that. The problem with Aro is he cannot keep his dick in his pants. He sleeps with all of the female bartenders, and then just blows them off like yesterdays garbage. He truly is a pig in that regard. I just do not understand what women see in him. Sure, he has long black hair and piercing eyes (From what the women have informed of anyway). Aro has a smile that can make you comfortable, or make a shiver run down your spine as if you are his prey, and he is the hunter. I have seen quite a few women just swoon when he flashes that smile, and men cringe. I have also seen those who are then willing to offer up their first born just to get off his shit list. Heidi came to me crying and hysterical. It took me several tries of soothing words and a half of bottle of Scotch (for me) to get her to calm down long enough to tell me what in the hell happened this time. After flashing my best calming smile and trying to dazzle her hysteria with my emerald green eyes, she finally made me aware that once again my douche of a GM had broken things off with her and insulted her "technique" in one demeaning swoop. Heidi, now finally calm looked at me with her red-rimed swollen eyes and said with a firm tone.

"_Edward, I quit!"_

I internally groan, and curse the day Aro was born .I try to plead with Heidi.

"_Heidi, please rethink this. Do not let him have the upper hand, show him that you will not stand for his lack of courteous behavior and move on. Show him that you do not care if he is with you or not, and that you will not let him dictate your happiness, or your employment here at Volturi."_

Heidi pondered what I had told her for what seemed like forever. I could not lose her, she was the last bartender that I had now that would never turn down an extra shift, or stay over to do shit inventory when I did not want to do it myself. "Crap," I think I can get her with a pay raise, yeah that will keep her.

"_Heidi"_

I began clearing my throat and running my hands through my already messy of hair.

"_I really need you to stay on. Will you stay if I offer to pay you an additional 125.00 a week? Plus you can take the rest of this week off paid?"_ I look at her expectantly.

"_Edward," she sighed; dropping my head in defeat, I knew that cocksucker just lost this club our best bartender ever! _

"_DAM HIS DICK!" _

"_I can't stay here, I really do not think I can handle looking at Aro every day and know that he will never feel for me the feelings that I feel for him. I just can't, it is way too hard."_

"_Ok Heidi if that is what you truly want. Just remember that you will always have a spot here at Volturi and you are by far the best bartender that I have ever had. Will you do me one favor before you leave?"_

"_Of course Edward, for you I will do anything, but stay." _She simply stated.

"_I really need you to train your replacement, now before you say no, when I hire someone, we can make sure that Aro is no where around while you train her ok?"_

Now with my hands back in my hair hoping against hope that she will not deny me this.

Heidi shook her head, obviously tossing the idea around in her mind.

"_It won't be without pay Heidi, the pay raise still stands "_

I quickly state, again hoping this will sway her decision.

A wide smile appears on her face.

"_Ok Edward I will train her, BUT you have to be here during the training and NO ARO, AND Aro cannot fuck this one Edward."_

I nod my head and then something hits me.

"_This one?"_ What does that mean?

"_Heidi, what do you mean THIS ONE?"_

"_Edward, do you remember my cousin that I brought to the company party about 2 years back?"_

How could I forget her, her big brown eyes that shined in the sun, her hair that I just wanted my hands to get lost in for days, years, oh hell forever? Those lips oh how I have wanted to feel her lips on mine for the past two years that I have secretly been lusting after Bella Swan, the most gorgeous woman that I have ever laid my eyes on. She was also the most unobtainable. Fuck. My. Life.

"_Yes, I think I remember her, brown hair, kind of quiet, been dating that douche Jacob Black?"_

With tears brimming in her blue eyes and her lip trembling, she spoke these words softly.

"_Edward, I cannot give you too many details, but Jacob hurt her really bad, when she called me screaming for help, and hearing him smack the phone from her hand I felt so cold, and so scared for her. My legs could not move fast enough to get to her Edward. So much blood, oh my god so much blood."_

I saw red, how can that mother fucker hurt the most beautiful angel in the entire world, my jaw clenched, my hands fisted. It took every ounce my strength to listen to what Heidi was telling me. My beautiful angel had been physically assaulted by a low down piece of shit.

"_When I got there, I found her in a pool of her own blood barely breathing, god Edward SO MUCH BLOOD!" Heidi shrieked trying to take the ghastly images in her mind and make them go away. "I quickly dialed 911 and begged for them to get there before she died, I had no idea where Jake was, and I really did not care if he saw me hovering over her. I found the deep gash on her arm and tried to stop the bleeding. I was telling her that I was there and that she would be ok, she started murmuring it was all her fault, and she should have known he would be mad. Edward she still will not tell me what made Jake so mad, and the cops still have not found him. He took off that night after he found me over her. He smacked me against the wall." _

"_Is that why you called off work for three days?"_

I asked putting the pieces of the puzzle together. The blood in my body coursing like acid burning me from the inside, I had to protect my angel. I would make sure that scum-sucking piece of shit never saw the light of day again.

Nodding her head to tell me yes.

"_I couldn't let you see the bruise on my check, knowing how mad you would get if the customers saw that one of team Volturi wasn't glamour perfect."_

"_HEIDI!"_

I yelled, wondering how this would help the situation. Making myself calm down for 2.5 seconds, I drop to my knees in front of my broken employee

"_Heidi, I wouldn't have been mad, you could have told me and I would have hunted that mother fucker down and beat him to bloody pulp for touching one of my girls. Do not ever be afraid to come and tell me anything do you understand? Just because I sign your paychecks does not mean that I do not care about who you are. Yes, you are a part of team Volturi and yes, we have an image of perfection but never ever, ever think that is going to come before who you are as a human being, or being one of my closest friends. "_

I quickly scoop up Heidi into a hug and hold her trembling body next to my chest, formulating a plan on how I can protect my Bella Swan, my angel, my sweet gosling. "My gosling?" when did she become "my" anything?

Taking a deep breath and stepping back Heidi explained to me that Bella would be released from the hospital in a few days. She was going to be in need of an apartment, along with a full time job that paid for it. Step one completed. My gosling would move into the empty apartment that is right across the hall from me. I own the building, and had yet to find anyone to move in yet, so it was hers, deposit free, I would furnish it. Step two, not only would she have a job, it would pay for everything and more. My gosling will never want for anything. She will gain her strength, her independence and she will become mine. Smiling at my brilliant plan of action, I look at Heidi, who could tell that the wheels where cranking away in my crazy calculating mind of mine.

"_Don't worry Heidi, I will make sure that she is taken care of. "_

Kissing the top of her head, I tell Heidi about the apartment. I tell Heidi, Bella can have it, no deposits and even at a reduced rent. Immediately, I also decided that the tiny detail that I wanted Bella for myself did not need to be heard by Heidi. In addition, that she has been the one in my fantasies ever since the company party two years ago. Heidi informs me of how proud Bella is, being that she is the daughter of a police chief. Feeling absolutely humiliated by the fact she was in an abusive relationship with fuckwad Black, she hated the thought of handouts. Heidi and I quickly agree that Bella is never to informed of our plans, and that she can fill out an application and go through the entire process just like everyone else. However, she would get the job offer up front.

After hammering out the details of Heidi's compensation package due to Aro and his roaming dick. The plans that where constructed for Bella, I flipped off my office light, closed, and locked my door. I headed back to my apartment knowing that in a few short days I would have my angel, my gosling living right across the hall from me where I could protect and help heal her. For the first time in many years, I left Volturi that night with a smile on my face.


	2. Chapter 2

Tarnished Gosling  
Chapter 2 - Shattered Dreams

BPOV

What the hell is that annoying beeping noise and why won't it stop? I  
have been hearing it constantly for God knows how long but I can't  
bring myself to really care or open my eyes to find out. I'm scared to  
open my eyes, afraid of what I may see or more so who I may see. I  
don't want to see...him. I don't want to remember everything he did to  
me. I had been lucid enough to know that by some miracle I had been  
saved from him (at least for the time being) and brought to the  
hospital. How long have I been here? I do not know. It could be  
hours, days, weeks. I only know that for now...I'm safe...until sleep  
overtakes me and I'm with him again.

"Miss Swan? Can you hear me?"

I feel the faint movement of the bed shifting as someone sits down. I  
keep my eyes shut, hoping they will go away. Of course..I'm never that  
lucky.

"Miss Swan, if you can hear me open your eyes or wiggle a finger."

Internally I groan, praying that if I give them what they want they  
will leave me alone. So I slowly open my eyes, blinking rapidly  
against the harshness of the light flooding the room.

"There you are." A woman with Carmel color shoulder length hair is  
perched at the foot of the bed smiling at me.

"I'm Dr. Esme Cullen; I've been overseeing your case since you were  
brought into the Emergency Room."

"How lon-" I cough and wince at the pain that seems to radiate from  
every part of my body. "How long have I been here?"

"Three days dear. It was touch and go there for awhile, you lost quite  
a bit of blood and we had to give you four pints to help stabilize you.  
You have been in and out of consciousness since you were brought in.  
Can you tell me about what happened Miss Swan?"

"Bella"

"Pardon?"

"Please call me Bella"

"Well Bella" Dr. Cullen gingerly pats my leg and smiles down at me.  
"You have quite a few injuries. Would you like to talk about what  
happened?"

Ignoring her question I ask one of my own instead. I'm not ready to  
relive that night with anyone least of all a doctor whom is only paid to  
care. No one else ever cared why should she?

"What are my injuries?"

She mindlessly flips through my chart and reads off my injuries like a  
grocery list. "Three broken ribs, one collapsed lung, gash on the  
right forearm, concussion, extensive bruising and other minor  
contusions...and the rape."

I nod and look towards the window silently willing the tears not to  
fall. I take a deep breath as I try to control my emotions, wincing as  
the pain throbs in my chest...oh right, collapsed lung good job Bella  
put more stress on your body. Which doesn't go unnoticed?

"Bella, I'm going write up an order and have the nurse bring you in  
some medication to help with the pain so you can rest." She stands and  
moves towards the door. "I'm not finished talking to you about this,  
but you need to rest and regain some strength..I'll be back in to see  
you in the morning Bella."

Several minutes later, a nurse comes in and administers the pain  
medication. Leaving my body feeling slightly numb and my mind as  
though it's gently floating on a cloud. Not at all an unpleasant  
feeling.

My head slowly lulls back against the pillow as sleep overtakes me.  
The incessant beeping noise that I've been hearing for three days or so  
Dr. Cullen tells me, slowly begins to fade until it completely  
disappears...

_**The apartment is dark as I walk in the front door and lay my keys and  
purse on the table. I look around, wondering why all the curtains are  
drawn in the middle of the day drowning the living room in darkness  
when something out of the corner of my eye catches my attention.  
He's here...sitting in the recliner in the far corner hunched over with  
his forearms resting on his knees and a almost empty bottle of Jack  
dangling from his hand. I stand motionless as he slowly looks up at me  
through hooded eyes...evil, pure evil is the only words to describe that  
look._

"Bella...what the fuck is this?" He says slowly, accentuating each  
order as though he's speaking to a small child. I look to his other  
hand noticing the small white stick between his fingers. Oh God  
no...How did he find it? I hid it! I hid it well! I should have  
left! The moment I found out I should have ran far away from  
him...some place safe where he would never find me...where he would  
never find US.

I snap out of my internal rambling and notice that he's slowly walking  
towards me. I move to take a step back but there's nowhere to go. My  
back is flush against the wall. I stand there, trembling willing my  
body to move, to fight back, to scream! Within a flash, I feel my head  
being slammed against the wall as he hovers in front of me mere inches  
from my face. The smell of stale liquor and pot on his breath is  
nauseating as I try to control my breathing and not go into a full on  
panic attack.

The feeling of his large hand snaking around my neck with increasing  
pressure scares the shit out of me. I kick my legs wildly hoping to  
connect to his body somehow. It's useless, that just further enrages  
him as he sneers at me.

"I said...This?" His breath, hot against my ear making  
my skin crawl.

"A pr-pregnancy test"

"YOU FUCKING WHORE!" he roars and slams my head into the wall again.

My body slumps to the floor as I fight to stay conscious. Don't fall  
asleep Bella, don't fall asleep Bella. I repeat to myself over and  
over again. Knowing if I do his face will surely be the last thing I  
see as I take my last breath.

He straddles my hips with his feet and leans over me. "You lied! You,  
stupid fucking bitch! You told me you were on the pill! You really  
think I'd have a kid with the likes of you? You're worthless, a  
nobody, the ugly duckling that no one else would ever want and this is  
what you do to me? I took pity on your sorry ass! No one else will  
ever want you..hell even I don't want you, you're just a useless waste  
of space! Good for cooking my meals and doing my laundry and when I'm  
really hard up...a quick fuck!"

"Please.." I whisper as he leers at me.

"Please what bitch?" He kicks my hard in my side.

"Please don't kill me" I cry.

"Oh Swan..When I'm through with you...you're going to wish you were  
dead." I look up at him as tears stream down my face, a faint clicking  
sound and a flash of metal comes into view as he whips a switch blade  
out of his back pocket.

I try to move, willing my hands and feet to carry me away from here.  
Damn it fight or flight Bella fight or flight! It feels as if my body  
is made of lead. Finally, I move my legs and begin to scoot across the  
floor when his hand grabs hold of my wrist jerking me back.

"You will not get away from me Bella" Taking his knife he runs it down  
my arm agonizingly slow as I cry out in pain.

"Please let me go!" I beg. "I - I won't tell anyone what happened,  
just please don't do this!"

"Shut the fuck up!" He yells as he repeatedly kicks me. The  
sickening sounds of bones cracking and my sobs fill the room as he  
begins to laugh.

"Oh how I love when you beg Swan but, begging will get you nowhere this  
time. He slams the knife down into the floor boards between my legs.  
"How are we going to remedy the mess you've made of things Bella?"

"I - I - I'll leave. You won't ever have to see me again. I'll never  
come back. Please, just let me go Jake!" I cry out as the heel of his  
boot slams down on my abdomen.

I gasp in agony as he kicks me again. My eyes flutter closed as my  
body gives in. It's over; he won't give up until I'm dead. My body  
begins to take its final gasps of air as I'm vaguely away of screams  
filling the apartment. Unsure if they are my own, and not caring either  
way. My mind finally succumbs to the darkness.


	3. Chapter 3

Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 3 Beautiful birds and Rum shots

Two Years ago:

EPOV

"Aro, do you have all of the liquor ready for the party?" I yelled down. Mentally checking everything that is going to be needed for our annual Team Volturi party and picnic.

"Yes Edward, I have it all covered. Esme should be meeting with the caterers in about 20 minutes to make sure that everything is there and accounted for. Before you ask yes I did order extra Rum for the game that you have planned, and the clown plus the bouncy house for the ones that have kids."

Clowns… Shiver.. Dam they give me the creeps. I thought myself, how can a child not be scared shitless of a grown man with a painted on perma smile? Shaking off my inner monologue I return to mentally checking off everything that was going to be needed to pull off yet another top of the line Volturi shindig. I was holding this year's annual bash at my father and mothers estate. Yes a lot on the grand side but my employees needed a lot of space this year to get as wild as needed and of course the team building exercises I had planned screamed "must have space". I giggled at myself thinking of how Aro was going to take to some of my "getting even" exercise geared just for him and his roaming dick. Oh boy was he going to be pissed.

The party was set to start at two in the afternoon. I had gotten a call from Heidi telling me that her cousin had just moved into town and she was hoping to bring her so she could meet a few new people. I had heard of Chief Swans daughter but she had moved away to attend Grand Canyon University before I ever had the chance of meeting her. I told Heidi that her bringing her cousin would not be a problem and that there would be lots of people for her to meet. Since this was an annual bash several of our frequent flyers if you will that grace us nightly at the club would be joining in our festivities. I was certain that she would enjoy herself at least being able to get a full laugh out of what I was going to be doing to men of Team Volturi. Emmett and Jasper will probably stop talking to me after this.

The party was in full swing when I first got a good look at her. I was standing next to the outdoor bar looking at the next event that I had planned. Heidi walked up to me smiling brightly and next to her was the most breath taking beautiful woman that I had ever seen in my life.

"Hey Edward, this is my cousin Bella Swan."

"Bella, this is my totally awesome boss and one of my most awesome friends Edward Cullen owner of Volturi."

She held her tiny hand out for me to shake, her big chocolate beautiful brown eyes sparkled with happiness, hope, excitement and so full of life. I admit my dumbass for the first time in my life was stunned speechless by her beauty. Confidence rolled off her tiny frame. Standing about five feet tall, her shoulders squared, her head held tall. I ran my eyes over her body seeing the tiny pink tank top she was wearing along with her black shorts that hugged those hips so tight that I was sure if I licked them I could taste her sweet flesh beneath them. "holy shit this woman is fucking stunning, wake up you douche you are gawking at her, Heidi is going to call your shit you perv stop it, shake her hand, smile your smile and get your head out of her fucking pants."

Shaking myself from the gripes of her stunning beauty I tenderly grab the tiny hand that is extended toward me.

"Hello Bella, nice that you could join us and enjoy the events I have planned for team Volturi."

Then I swear I heard the angels sing, felt the planets align, and my world as I knew it shift in all of 2.5 seconds as I touch the softest most delicate hand I have ever felt in my life. A crack and fizzle of electricity coursed through my body going straight to my heart stopping it, then restarting it as I look at the woman who stood before me. Gasping from the electric shock I stare into her hypnotizing eyes. "I know she felt that shit… fuck what was that shit.. fuck fuck fuck what in the hell is going on with me I am turning into a complete and utter shit heel here, gawking, drooling, sporting a hard on so hard and fierce I'm sure that if it where coal I would definitely be forging a diamond right now." Bella's lips part with a sharp intake of air when the electric current shoots through our hands. "Oh. My. God. Look at that tongue, oh I want that tongue. I want to taste it, feel how soft and warm and holy Jesus how wet her tongue is. I have to have this woman. Oh yes Bella will be mine. I will have her sing her swan song all over me.

"Thank you Edward for letting me attend your party it is very generous of you." Bella replies softly, looking directly in my eyes spearing me with her words.

Out of the corner of my eye I see another person I have never seen before. He is very tall, looking well over 6 feet. Long black hair tied in a pony at the nape of his neck, deep bronze skin and a muscular chest. If I didn't know better I would think that this is Emmett's Native American twin. Geezers he is huge. But who the fuck is he and what is he doing at my party. Wait a fuck the minute, why is he staring at Bella that way?

FUCK. MY. LIFE

"Edward, this is Jacob, he is Bella's boyfriend" states Heidi who is now frowning when she sees the scowl that is now very apparent on my face.

"Edward, I'm sorry I didn't think you would mind if he tagged along, they just started dating so I.." Heidi quickly states trying to defuse my apparent disapproval.

"Heidi it is no big deal, really don't worry about it." I state trying not to sound like a complete dick.

Gigantor, strides over looking at me and then at Bella, I see a hint of something that I cannot place, as he wraps his tree trunk arms around Bella's tiny waist, he places a kiss on the side of her neck causing the sweetest giggle escape from those stunning lips. My chest constricts, my heart starts to pound, my blood coursing through my veins, my adrenaline definitely on the rise as a feral growl erupts from my mouth. "Holy fuck, did I just growl over a woman that is clearly taken?" Stunned I try to cover my obvious want to hike my legs and mark my territory caveman tendency and I violently begin to cough.

Heidi looking at me like I had just grown a second head that obviously looked like I had signed a pack with the devil and he was coming to collect on my soul "boss, you ok?" as she is slapping my back trying to dislodge the foot that I had stuck so deep in my mouth I could taste my ancestors toe jam.

"Yeah Heidi I am ok, sorry."

Jacob clearly not a stupid as he looks gives me a smirk that had we been alone I would have loved to wipe off his smug ass face. Jacob extended his mitt with sausage fingers in my direction.

"Hello Edward quite the hoe down you got going on here; I have never seen so many pieces that are model material in one location other than a strip joint." Stated Jacob; wiggling his eyebrows in a suggestive manner at me.

Disgusted, I stare Jacob dead in the eye and calmly yet clearly state:

"Jacob, those "pieces" as you so eloquently called them are the awesome women of team Volturi consisting of my bartender, waitresses and our entertainment staff, those "pieces" are women Jacob (my voice raising with my tone becoming more clipped and irritated) they are not objects to be leered at, they are not pieces of meat, they are not for you to use and discard when you are finished with them. They have brains, they have families, and yes they have bodies of perfection which is a requirement at Volturi but not because I want them smacked, pinched, groped, ogled or drooled over but to show that not all night clubs are about sex, drugs, loud music and a one night stand. ALL of my girls are college educated as well as trained to defend themselves against those whom choose to objectify the fairer sex thinking that they are mere toys to be played with and tossed to the next dickwad that wants to dip his wick and get it WET!" my breathing was erratic, my blood pressure going through the roof and I wanted to rip off his tree trunk arms and beat him till he didn't have a single breath left to even say the word "pieces" to me again. On top of what kind of piece of shit talks about women like that in front of their girlfriend, seriously who fucking does that? Bella's eye where wide and shifting side to side clearly uncomfortable. Trying to defuse the situation I turn slightly and face Bella.

"Bella, it was a pleasure to meet you, I am sorry I got a little upset there, please accept my apology."

Very softly and in barely a whisper I heard "no problem Edward nice to meet you too."

I looked at Heidi who was clearly just as pissed as I was at Jacob, "Heidi I think we need to set up for the rum shot exercise, tell all male team members to meet me in the tent, and oh did u bring your uniform?"

Heidi beginning to relax and her smile wide and fierce knowing what I had planned for the rum shot game nodded her head and stated that she put it in the tent.

I shot Jacob another don't fuck with me glare, Bella a tight smile turned on my heel and went to the tent. On my way to the tent to completely fuck up my male team I encounter Rose, my best waitress at Volturi. She is the epitome of beauty. Long blonde hair, perfectly huge breasts that could make a grown man cry, a body that has so many of the right curves that you wished she was the autobahn and you a speeding car wanting to experience every dip and curve; the bluest eyes; that the deepest seas would weep at out of pure jealousy. Rose had the brain of a genius and the personality of a wild bear. Yes, she could be a little rough around the edges but anyone who knows Rose, knows that her heart runs like the deepest wells ever dug in the world.

"Hey Rose, do you think that you can get the women to get dressed in their gear for the rum shot exercise and meet us at the dance floor and tables please?"

"Sure thing Ed."

Shaking my head walking off, I did not bother to tell her to stop calling me Ed, even though I hated it, it made me sound like a stupid talking horse. I made it into the tent to find all of the male team member s looking at me waiting on baited breath as to what torture I was going to make them endure today. Every single male that works for me had to be at our annual functions or be fired on the spot, no if's ands or buts about it.

"ok gents, I know a few of you know that every year I make the men go through a sensitivity exercise to further my point of how the women at Volturi are not there for our enjoyment" collective groans course throughout the crowd of men whom begin to shift nervously as I pick up a Volturi uniform obviously worn by our fairer team members. "Now, I am going to hand you a uniform that is worn by our ladies, you are to change into them, grab a tray and meet me on the dance floor next to the table. Yes the heels are also mandatory, along with the stockings, and no jackets. I will not budge on this so don't try and make it fast, you all have 10 minutes, anyone not out there will be fined 50.00 per minute that you are late and if you don't dress out you will be fired, are we clear gentlemen?"

Getting the stink eye from 10 men can be quite an intimidating experience especially when your best friends happen to be shooting their stink eye at you. Fearing the safety of my junk, I quickly leave the tent and head for the dance floor. The women are all dressed in men's clothes, placed at different parts of the dance floor and tables as well as some of our local patrons who agreed to help me with this exercise and where just as anxious as I was to see Aro in a Volturi uniform that he himself decided on.

After their 10 minutes I see the men begin their long walk to the dance floor, all bright tomato red, stumbling and looking down right uncomfortable. I have Heidi line them up on the dance floor like Aro does every night for inspection. The uniform is tiny, tight black shirts with a low v neck line and very revealing of skin not leaving much to the imagination of those who are looking at their bodies. The shorts are a bright red booty short that their perfect asses more often than not show itself from. Thigh high black stalking that end right underneath the bottom hem of the booty shorts showing off the clips from the garter belts that range in color according to chain of command. Topped off with shiny black, open toed, strap back stiletto five inch heels. Seeing the women in their uniform is one thing, seeing hairy man legs ug disturbing. Once the cat calls, whistles, hoots, hollers and giggles stopped we began.

I step up to the mic and thank all of our guests for arriving at our function and let them know that for the remainder of the evening our male team will be at their beck and call after a little game of rum shots is complete. I also ask that everyone view my male team as they would my female team and treat them in any manner that they felt was inappropriate and or disgusting at any time that they had been a part of or patronage of Volturi. Huge wide smiles appeared on all of the female faces that where staring at me. I look to my left to see Aro's eyes wide with fear and Emby's face bright red.

"Ok here Is the game, gentlemen, you are to go to the bar, get 6 shots of rum place them on your tray along with two glasses of coke on the rocks. Place the try in your hand palm up, no resting on your shoulders, walk to the tables that are designated to your station and deliver the shots without spilling them. IF you spill them, you have to return to the bar and take that many shots, on top of return to the table that you have not tended to properly and give the ladies their shots. Once you have delivered 10 shots to each table in your station, you are then to return to the bar chug a beer with grace and dignity, then pick up a pen and pad and tend to your stations accordingly. Once the rum shots have been completed you will begin to offer them dinner, at which time you are to make DAM sure their dining experience is one of high quality that is demanded and expected at Volturi. Are we clear?"

Nodding heads and smiling faces appear before me. I see a few of my men feeling a little smug thinking that either they can take this challenge no problem or that they are that graceful in five inch heels. Again another thought that makes me shudder.

The rum shot game begins with all 10 men grabbing their shots, balancing their trays and stumbling to their stations. Of the 60 shots that went out only 5 survived the cause and were delivered. Aro took 4 steps, wobbled and went face down on the edge of a table cracking his forehead with a loud thump. Roars of laughter filled the back yard of my parents' estate. The men where objectified, ogled, cat called, pinched, groped and made to feel like walking talking sex. The one whom I thought would have done the worst due to his sheer size and thick thighs that actually finished first with the quickest time was Emmett. He actually took this exercise a lot better than I thought he would. He elegantly floated across the dance floor serving his shots, smiling at the women and the patrons, apologizing if he ever made them feel like pieces of meat. I allowed Emmett to kick off his heels while servicing the guests through dinner which he was the utmost grateful. Aro on the other hand looked like a raging bull on the war path looking for anyone whom he could kill and make miserable at a later date. I pulled Aro aside and let him know in no uncertain terms that if anyone comes to me again because of his roaming dick and his lack of class he would be on waitress duty for a month in full uniform.

Throughout the rest of the party I kept my eye on the beauty that has captured my attention. Watching her laugh at the men during the exercise and being a trooper when 6 shots of rum landed in her lap. Her laughter seared into my brain, a sound so profound and so beautiful that I knew I would forever be her slave if only that mutt would go the fuck away. I knew one day I would make that beautiful swan, my Gosling mine cause apes like Jacob can't help but fuck up eventually, and I Edward Cullen would happily take his spot at her side to protect her, love her, and be hers.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N This is a collaboration with Becky Young. Becky writes all of the female pov and I write the male. This is our first try at fan fiction so please be gentle. **

**We do not own Twilight Stephanie Myers does. We do not own Edward or Bella just this story. **

**I hope that you all enjoy and have fun reading what our minds have joined together. **** Brandi**

Tarnished Gosling  
Chapter 4 - Forgotten Pasts and Delicious Memories

BPOV

It had been one week. One God forsaken week since I was admitted to  
the hospital. The nightmares still plague me. Everything he did,  
everything he said, his smell, the feeling of his hands against my skin  
haunts me, sickening me to my very core.

_** Darkness - the only thing shielding me from everything happening  
around me. My mind trying to protect itself, shifting me in and out of  
consciousness, pleading with my body - my heart not to give up not to  
let him win. I know I'm about to die. I feel it in every fiber of my  
being, in every thump of my battered heart, in every excruciating  
breath my lungs try to capture. I'm vaguely aware of him lying on top  
of me, possessing me as he always does. Taking what he believes is  
rightly his.  
His heavy pants against the shell of my ear as he harshly thrusts into  
me over and over again. I want to scream out, do something to make him  
stop. My hand instinctively curls into a fist..and in a last desperate  
plea for survival I connect with his temple causing him to falter  
slightly._  
I'm startled awake bolting upright in the bed as my left arm wraps  
instinctually around my torso protecting my battered ribs. My  
breathing begins to slow as I become aware of my surroundings. I'm  
safe, still in the protecting confines of my hospital room. I lean  
back against the pillows gently running my hand in circles across my  
abdomen. "It's just you and me now little one. I won't let anything  
ever happen to you." Jake succeeded in his torture of me but he  
underestimated the strength of the life inside me. Now I have  
something to live for. Someone to fight for. Someone that no one, not  
even Jake can ever take from me. The only thing I have left...my child.

"You'll fucking pay for that you stupid whore." He spat.

I try to hit him again unsuccessfully as he grabs my wrist pinning it  
above my head. "What's the matter Isa-bella? Doesn't it feel good?"  
I close my eyes in an attempt to ward off the tears that are about to  
burst forth. "That's right Bella, close your eyes. Maybe behind those  
eye lids your dream man is there to save you. Is he there Bella?  
Whispering sweet nothings into your ear, telling you all the things you  
want to hear?"

"STOP IT JAKE! JUST STOP!" I scream out.

He laughs bitterly slowing his movements. "Aww come on Bella. I know  
what you dream about. I know all the thoughts running through your  
mind you disgusting bitch. How long has it been now? Hm? Two years?  
Two years that you think about and pine over someone who's not here,  
who will never be here. You're pathetic! He doesn't even remember  
your name. I've spent the last two years awake at night listening to  
you call his name in your sleep. Dreaming of him. Wishing it was him  
touching you, kissing you. Wishing it was HIM here with you instead of  
ME. You owe me you little slut!" He rams into me again as I fight  
against him. I jerk my hands in a futile attempt to free myself from  
his grasp. This only serves to anger him more. His other hand wraps  
around my throat in a vice-like grip slowly draining the life from me  
as darkness once again consumes me.**

I jump at the sound of a soft tapping on the hospital door. "Come in."

"Good morning sunshine!"

"You're awfully chipper this morning dear cousin." I say dryly

"Yes well why wouldn't I be? My favorite cousin is getting released  
from the hospital tomorrow. You're doing so well and getting stronger  
every day as is our little bundle of joy." She coo's as she pats my  
tummy.

"Heidi, have you forgotten that I now have no place to live and no job  
and it's highly likely that once I do leave here Jake will hunt me down  
and try to finish what he started?"

"Jake is on the lamb Bella. He ran after he hit me. My guess is, he  
would have done to me exactly what he did to you except he didn't account  
for my trusty pepper spray and the fact that I had 911 on speed dial.  
I don't think he'll come back Bella there are far too many people  
looking for his sorry ass, it would be a suicide mission for him to  
return."

"As much as I want to believe that Heidi, I don't put anything past  
Jake. You know what he's like. When he sets his mind to something he  
follows through one way or another. I know that someday - maybe not  
today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not even next year..but one day..he'll  
come for me."

"Well we have to insure that you're hard to find and protected which, I  
just so happen to be able to offer you dear Bella."

"What are you talking about?"

"I have a place that you can stay as long as you want, a safe place  
where you won't have to worry about anyone least of all Jake finding  
you. Also, I have a job opportunity as well." She beams.

"Uh um I can't afford to pay rent anywhere right now Heidi. No job  
remember? I have to work in order to find money to save for a new  
place and given my current circumstances it looks like I'm going to be  
laid up for a little while and won't be able to work for at least a few  
weeks after I leave here."

"Not a problem, it's already been taken care of oh ye of little faith!"

"How can you promise me something like that? Do you have a trust fund  
somewhere that dear old gramps left you and if so why was I not  
included in that?"

"No Bella" She laughs heartily. "But I do happen to know someone with  
plenty of money and an extra apartment that's not in use..Who by the  
way, when I explained your situation was all too happy to help you out."

"Great, that's all I need. Someone I don't even know knowing that I  
got the shit beat out of me by my low life boyfriend and am now  
homeless jobless and knocked up. Thanks for that Heidi." I spat.

"Oh you know him Bella. Would you like to meet him? Maybe that will  
jog your memory."

"Him who? And why do you sound so damn cryptic?"

She holds up one finger to silence me and walks to the door. I hear  
the sound of muffled voices but cannot make out anything being said. A  
few moments later, Heidi re-enters the room followed closely behind  
by...HOLY. MOTHER. OF. SWEET. BABY. JESUS. It can't be. Oh dear  
lord kill me now, put me out of my misery because I know I am surely  
dreaming at this very moment. Those deep emerald pools of sex, want ,  
longing and need. The one's that have tortured my every thought and  
dream since the moment I first laid eyes on them. Every desire, every  
fantasy, every dream has been of this man and those eyes and has  
consumed me body and soul for the last two years of my life leaving me  
aching with desire and hollow with doubt that it would never be.

"Bella, you remember my boss Edward Cullen?"


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N This is a collaboration with Becky Young. Becky writes all of the female pov and I write the male. This is our first try at fan fiction so please be gentle. **

**We do not own Twilight Stephanie Myers does. We do not own Edward or Bella just this story. I hope that you all enjoy and have fun reading what our minds have joined together .**** Brandi**

Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 5 fantasies and furniture

EPOV

Leaving Volturi tonight my stomach filled with knots, angst, and most of all anger. I cannot believe that someone especially that piece of shit mutt that would lay his sausage fingered paws all over the one sweet woman that has brought light to my dark world. Being a nightclub owner has its ups and downs just like any job. But being a Cullen; with the name of notoriety that my family name carries comes a bunch of women who want nothing but money, and social status. My mother is Dr. Esme Cullen; the most caring woman that I have ever met. My father Dr Carlisle Cullen; a generous man, whom I can share my most inner secrets with, and not have any fear of the outside world ever knowing. Both my parents have made huge strides in their fields. My mother's being of a general practitioner but tends to lean towards trauma from abuse. My father loves the thrill of emergency medicine and is the chief of the ER. Both have wanted me to find that special someone whom I can share my most intimate thoughts, feeling and emotions with. Although I have already found her, she has not yet chosen me.

I go to my kitchen and scope out what little there is in my fridge. Hmmm slim pickings tonight, dam I need to go to the store. I'm guessing that pizza is again on the menu. After ordering pizza and taking a long hot very much needed shower, I am finding my thoughts still stuck on my gosling. How her beautiful eyes sparkle when she laughs. How she has 5 different smiles. The lovely colors of blush that creep across her face when she is embarrassed. The way she shifts from her left to her right foot when she is starting to get annoyed. The way she twirls her hair between her fingers while reading her book. My personal favorite when she bites her bottom lips when deep in thought.

Dam it now my cock is hard again..fuck. Dam thing has a mind all its own I swear. Well since I have to be up bright and early to start going over applications, I decide to head off to bed. My bed and in my mind's eye Gosling and I are free to frolic and play as much as I want and not have to worry about some ape coming in and ruining my good time. I climb out of pajamas bottoms just leaving on my boxers as I slide into my lonely bed, my cock stiff as an iron rod seeking the electricity of Bella and her touch. I quickly pull them down and grab my shaft begin to picture my gosling from the very first time I saw her that fate filled day at my parents house.

"_Edward, it is very nice to meet you." She states looking at me with a seductive glare leading me to believe that behind them stunning brown eyes is a vixen ready to come out and play. She grabs me by the hand and leads me over to the pool house a fair distance from the party. _

"_Bella, I need.." quickly cut off by the softest lips that I could ever imagine, a taste so pure and sweet that just thinking about her triggers a Pavlovian response to my cock making it harder and harder as her lips push into mine. Her tongue, warm and wet my want beginning to rise. I pull Bella tighter to me to feel her body closer to mine, I need to feel her, I need to touch her everywhere. I begin to nibble on her neck and I can hear her panting and wanting me to move forward to touch her and feel her. I let the tip of my tongue trace along her collar bone as I lightly kiss the dip in her neck. My hands go under her shirt with my thumbs rubbing her hard nipples that are getting harder under my touch. MMM I need to suck on those; I have to taste her sweet flesh. Removing her top and casting off her bra to the other side of the room, I begin to lick and tease her taunt nipples with just the tip of my tongue. She tastes so sweet. I could live the rest of my life in this sweetness right here. She begins to moan and oh my god could my dick get any harder.. Fuck this woman is going to be the death of me. _I begin to riffle through the times that I have seen my gosling over the years. The times that she has come to the club to talk to Heidi, seeing her laugh; how carefree she looked then. The time that I saw her drinking a soda threw a straw I thought for sure that I was going to cum in my pants on the sight of her sweet hot tongue wrapping around the straw and her lips sweet love of all that is holy those fucking lips. I begin to stroke myself harder and faster at the thought of her lips all wrapped around my cock, with those big beautiful eyes staring up at me threw her long lashes. My breathing labored my pulse quickening and the familiar tug in my loins telling me that yep Bella has again fulfilled another night of the spank bank. I release with a loud groan and Bella's name spilling from my lips.

I rolled over on to my side and began to think about the apartment across the way. It is nice, and cozy. Two bedrooms should definitely be more than enough right? Heidi mentioned something about Bella majoring in English lit while she was in college. Hmmm I wonder what it is that she has in mind for her future. Heidi told me that when Bella was growing up that she used to write for the high school paper submitting short cute stories. Hmm maybe I will talk to Riley at the post and see what I can line up there. Shit I hope I am not over stepping my bounds. Looking at my clock I see that it is way to late to call my mother, crap she left several messages today. I begin to think about the furniture that is going to be needed.

Next morning I head over to Bed Bath and Beyond to begin the tedious task of putting the apartment together. I get a nice king size bed with a feather down mattress topper. Mm soft. I pick up some different sheet sets, purple, blue and white Egyptian cotton, only the best for my gosling. I find the fluffiest pillows and notice a nice picture that I think she may enjoy. It's a simple picture nothing from a famous artist, just a single man sitting at a piano on a bluff overlooking the ocean, his sheets of music blown around from the breeze. Captivating if I can say so myself. I love to play the piano, getting lost in the notes and the feel of the music.

I head over to a few other shops to get everything she could possibly need in the kitchen, bathroom and the spare bedroom. I also found some bookshelves with plenty of space; Heidi said she loved to read. I arrange for everything to be delivered that next day. I look at my cell and notice two texts and 3 missed calls.

The texts from Heidi asking me to meet her at the Hospital to talk to Bella before her release tomorrow. I quickly reply that I will definitely be there around two. I called my mother back only to find that she was also wanting me at the hospital that day but was being very well weird and cryptic about what she wanted "dam it she is setting me up again, what is there a new candy stripper at the hospital?" When is she going to see that I can get my own date? Well duh dumbass you have only been secretly lusting after Bella for what two years now. You can't even form complete sentences around her let alone tell her that you are so madly in love. WHAT.. no lust maybe not love not yet, I don't even know her really. But man would I love to get to know her. Sit with her on the patio at night and look at the stars while we talk about our hopes and dreams, snuggling around one another. Sighing I take a look at the clock and see that I have one more hour till I need to be at the hospital to see Bella. I decide that I might as well get some grocery shopping out of the way while I have time.

Everywhere I look I see things that I know Bella would absolutely love. White lilies in a vase that I place on the kitchen bar, little things that I may notice that hopefully she won't since I'm sure it will give me away as to how much I have watched her over the years. I know that she is simple and doesn't like things that are to materialistic in value. So I kept it simple, plain pot holders, a not to technical coffee maker, decorative art of landscapes and ocean views. Ok I went top of the line on the TV and the stereo system, I'm a guy it's my nature. By the time that I had the kitchen set up and everything in line except the furniture that was being delivered in the morning, I looked around and smiled at the fact that I am not a complete idiot when it comes to decorating. Ha ma I can do some things on my own, I have the Cullen eye too.

I got to the hospital at two; I asked reception to point me in the direction of Bella Swans room. The receptionist said they had no one under that name at their hospital. Clearly confused I sent a quick text off to Heidi letting her know that I was at the hospital and asked if Bella had already been released. She said they were in from 203 and to come right up. I began to get really nervous. The butterflies in my stomach felt like they had just entered a sock hop dance and I was their dance floor. I walked up to the door getting ready to knock and I hear my angels panic.

"Great, that's all I need. Someone I don't even know knowing that I got the shit beat out of me by my low life boyfriend and now homeless, jobless and knocked up. Thanks Heidi"

Oh dear god he got her pregnant. My poor angel, my broken Bella. Will she want him in her life? Does she want that baby growing up in an abusive house? Does he know that she is going to give him a gift so precious and perfect? I felt like my lungs couldn't hold any air, what if she didn't want him anymore? Would she let me be a father to her baby? _Seriously Edward, what are u turning into here? This is her baby, her life, you haven't been a part of it, and you are here to just help, remember Mr. Knight in shining armor, here to help her, save her._ I was broken from my inner douche when Heidi came out of her room.

"Hey Edward, um look, Bella Is really upset and she thinks that I told you everything that happened ok, so do not be surprised if she is well a little harsh and not wanting to accept your help ok, she is feeling very proud, embarrassed and quite humiliated right now. Oh and she is pregnant about 6 weeks or so."

"Heidi, I will not say anything to Bella that may upset her more ok, I will let her know that I don't know the whole story that it is hers to tell and that when she is ready if she would like to tell me she can ok?"

Heidi opens up Bella's Hospital door and steps in.

"Bella, you remember my boss Edward Cullen?"

The look on Bella's face was absolutely priceless and a look I had never seen before. She instantly blushed, turned her eyes from my gaze and her face looked like a mixture of pain, lust, need, hurt and anticipation.

Looking at my gosling for the first time since her attack I was immediately shocked to my core. Purple bruises around her eyes, clear as day finger marks on her slender neck, her once pale skin now marred by cuts, scrapes, bruises. Anger immediately coursed through my system, I SAW RED! I looked into her eyes when she finally looked back up at me, so much pain, her once and shinning eyes now dull and full of all of the pain that he forced on to her, he had tarnished my sparking gosling. I made a resolve on sight of her that I would hunt that mother fucker down, lord knows I had enough resources and I would make him pay for what he did to her. NO one messes with a CULLEN. Whoa there tiger, she isn't a Cullen. Yeah well she will be dam it, she will never have to feel this kind of pain ever. I would be a father to her baby, a lover for her soul, and her best friend (if she will have me).

"Bella" I began softly. "Heidi told me that you are in need of a place to live and well, since there is an apartment open in the building I own, I would like to offer it to you. I don't know exactly what your situation is but it's furnished with all that you will need to be comfortable, top of the line security and the rent is really cheap." I state looking hopeful trying to convey with my eyes how badly I need her to move across the hall from me.

Bella began crying as soon as I finished and I began to panic. I went to her side and sat on her bed, she immediately recoiled from me. Noticing how stupid I was I stood up and lightly placed my hand on hers. "Bella, I will never hurt you. I can see for myself your injuries so I am safe to assume some bad things have happened, and since you need a place to stay I think I am also safe in assuming that Jacob is no longer in your life." She nodded her head yes as her silent tears began to streak her cheeks. Oh how I wanted to just kiss them away. Seeing her cry tore at my soul. I can't have her crying I cannot take it!

Heidi immediately jumped in and told her that she could also apply at the club and get a job either as a waitress or that she would train her at tending bar. I saw a small fleck of hope flash across her face. I smiled at her my best smile telling her "Bella, please accept my offer."

Bella smiled at me, a genuine smile and simply stated "Can I think about it Edward? It sounds great, but…" cuts off her own train of thought.

Felling torn and disheveled at her statement not trying to feel rejected I stepped back from her bed, and told her "sure Bella, Heidi has my cell, just have her call me or come by the club to let me know ok?"

I turned and left her room. Not wanting to deal with my mother I decided to send her a text stating that there was a issue that needed to be tended to at the club and got into my car.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N This is a collaboration with Becky Young. Becky writes all of the female pov and I write the male. This is our first try at fan fiction so please be gentle. **

**We do not own Twilight Stephanie Myers does. We do not own Edward or Bella just this story. I hope that you all enjoy and have fun reading what our minds have joined together **** Brandi**

Tarnished Gosling  
Chapter 6 - New Hope and New Beginnings

_Jesus fucking Christ Bella get it together! Mr. Fuck Me Eyes, Mr. Walking Sex, Mr. Man I'm hopelessly in love with whoa what?_ Just offered me a place to live and a new job..a chance at a new beginning  
and I told him I have to think about it? What the hell is wrong with me? Maybe it's all these pain pills screwing with my mind. Yes, that must be it. Otherwise, had I been of sound mind I would have  
jumped him the second he walked in the door and begged him to take me anywhere as long as it was with him.

I had run into Edward several times over those courses of the past few years when I would go visit Heidi at Volturi. It was never more than passing pleasantries as he was working and I had joined Heidi and Edward for several meals on occasion. But that didn't stop him from invading my every thought. There had been something about him..Something different from anyone else I had ever met in my entire life. I felt it the moment I met him at the Team Volturi party two years ago. The intensity behind his emerald orbs, the way my dripped off his tongue like the sweetest honey, the way he made me feel when he touched my hand. That heated electrical pulse shot all the way through my entire body and lodged itself into my very soul where it has remained even to this very day.

All that combined led me to take matters into my own hands so to speak and basically eye fuck the man right where we were standing _Fucking hell I STILL can't believe I did that shit, that's so not me but, I didn't hear him protesting either_. He had obviously been attracted to me.I'm still kicking myself in the ass over the fact that my sense of loyalty kept me in my relationship with Jacob, when what I should have done is broken things off and went after what I really wanted.

Jacob Black and I had been friends for much of our lives. It seemed like a natural course of action for us to progress into dating. However, while I did love Jake I was never _in_ love with him. I never felt about him the way I should have felt towards someone I was in a relationship with. Jake was the safe choice. He had always been there for me and I knew he always would be until the day he realized my heart truly belonged to someone else.

_"Bella wake up, you're sleep talking again." He shakes my shoulder  
rousing me from my sleep._.

"What's the matter Jake?" I roll over facing him.

"You were talking in your sleep again Bells.." he sighs.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to keep you up."

"It's ok but, do you care to tell me what you were dreaming about? Or rather,  
whom you were dreaming about?"

"I don't remember. You know I hardly ever remember my dreams Jake.  
What did I say that has you so worked up?"

"Who's Edward Bella?" He huffs at me.

"I don't know what you're talking about Jacob, I don't think I know an  
Edward and if I do, I certainly don't remember him." I lied.

"Cut the shit Isabella, you've been dreaming about some guy named  
Edward for weeks now! I never mentioned it because, I thought you were  
just having you're random weird Bellaesque dreams but this shit has  
been going on for awhile now, so what the fuck is going on? Are you  
cheating on me?"

"Jesus Jake! I'm not cheating on you! Don't you know me better than  
that?"

"I used to, now I'm not so sure anymore, given the fact that your dream  
man keeps making his regular nightly appearances." He says dryly.

"Jacob please" I sigh. "The only Edward that I know of is the one we  
met at the party we went to for Heidi's work. Her boss remember?"

"So that's who you're dreaming about then?"

"No! Fucking hell Jacob! What I'm saying is that is the only person I  
know named Edward, I met the guy for a total of thirty seconds! Which,  
you happened to be present for! So no, I'm not dreaming of him I don't  
even know the guy for pete sake!" I lie again.

"Okay Bella, I'll let it go for now. Keep in mind though..I don't  
share and you are MY girlfriend. If I ever find out there is someone  
else, things will get rather ugly. Do I make myself clear?" he  
deadpans.

"Crystal. Are you going to drag me by my hair back to the cave now?"

He huffs and rolls his eyes. "Go to sleep Bella."

"Aye Aye Captain" I mutter as I roll over and turn off the light

After everything Jake and I had been through in our lives. I never imagined things would end up this way. He had been my protector for so long and my best friend. Now I was left with nothing. No protector and no best friend to confide in. Sure I have Heidi but, she's always hated Jacob. I never really understood why because any time I tried to talk to her about it she would just say "he's no good" or "he's a douche bag". I guess now he had finally proven her right. _sigh_

As I lay in this god awful hospital bed, I idly wonder about Edward and his offer to help me. Why would he do that? Just for Heidi? He barely knows me so why would go out of his way to help out a relative  
stranger? Yes, we shared an amazing eye fucking the first time we met but, surely that's not cause enough to offer up an apartment and a job right? I do know that I need to make my decision soon, as tomorrow the day of my release is fast approaching. As I ponder over all my thoughts and questions I slowly drift off to sleep wondering what the hell Edward Cullen really has up his sleeve and what his motives are.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Ok folks I dont know if it got pulled or whatever, but here is the original chapter 7, for whatever reason we had two chap 8, sorry **

**Dislaimer:Becky and i do not own**

* * *

Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 7 Broken wings and Bloody Knuckles

EPOV

Seeing Bella so battered and bruised really hurt me deeper in my core than I had anticipated. How can I really love a woman that I really don't even know? Sure, I have seen her hundreds of times over the past two years, had dinner with her and Heidi a dozen times when she would stop by the club. Never once did she lead me to believe that things between her and the ape were abusive. I have never told anyone of my feelings for Bella. I am pretty sure that I have done pretty well in hiding this. Jasper has caught me a dozen or so times day dreaming of my gosling. Being the awesome friend that he is, he left it alone. I started up my car and turned on my iPod, quickly jumping to Bella's play list the one song that I thought sang of how I was feeling right now roared through my speakers.

**Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor.**

**Reaching for the phone 'cuz I can't fight it anymore.**

**And I wonder if I ever cross your mind?**

**For me it happens all the time.**

**It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.**

**Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.**

**And I don't know how I can do without.**

**I just need you now.**

**Another shot of whiskey, can't stopping looking at the door.**

**Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before.**

**And I wonder if I ever cross your mind?**

**For me it happens all the time.**

**Oh whoa**

**Yes I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all.**

**It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.**

**And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk**

**and I need you now.**

**Well I don't know how I can do without.**

**I just need you now**

**I just need you now.**

**Oh baby I need you now.**

Pulling up at the club, listening to Lady Antebellum's Need You Now I felt my heart constrict knowing how raw my feelings are these days. After hearing what happened to Bella, knowing that she does not have a clue how deep my feelings are running for her, I begin to develop a plan on how I can be here for her, help her heal and protect her without her knowing how much I really needed her in my life. At this point with my gosling being so tarnished I would take whatever she was willing to give me no matter how small I would take it.

I got out of my car trying to not to hang my head making everyone know what a baby I was being and head off to the office to tackle the applications that I had casted off to the side in order to go shop for Bella's apartment. Sighing, grabbing a glass and pouring some Scotch I looked at my first application..Hmm Alice Brandon…

A/N **Just to warn those right now, this section is going to get a lot heavy and very violent. I do not condone physical nor mental abuse toward any human no matter what. If you are squeamish or sensitive do not read this next section you will not miss out on any part of the story by skipping this, we do understand.**

Jacob pov

I woke up this morning feeling well to be honest a lot on edge and downright pissed off. All night last night I heard her, moaning, panting, wanting, and screaming out _his _name. "Edward, she's moan; yessssss Edward, oh baby right there." Why doesn't she want me? Why can't she see that we are made for each other? I have tried to show her when we first got together, giving her flowers, kissing her with passion and making sure that every day she woke up she felt loved. Until. That. FUCKING. PARTY. I saw the way that he looked at her, all puppy dogged, lust filled in his eyes and in complete admiration of what was mine. SO yes I was smug and downright arrogant about my possessiveness of Bella. Bella is my girl, not some rich club owning pansy ass that puts his men in girls' uniforms. What the fuck was that? Humiliating them that way, what did that prove.. Nothing. And that speech that he gave me about how women aren't objects pasha what a girl.

Bella had already left for the day when I stumbled into the bathroom. I noticed I needed some soap, so I went to grab a new bar. I saw a white stick stuffed way in the back. WHAT. THE. FUCK is THIS? Oh my fucking.. SHIT she is pregnant..no no no no no this can't be, all the tests said I would never father a kid. That bitch has been cheating on me! THAT WHORE I roar out in the bathroom. Tearing through the house I grab my bottle of jack and take a long pull, feeling the searing burn run down my throat. I will show her, I will make that fucking bitch pay for her going behind my back to fuck that rich prick. I tried to keep my hands off of Isabella over the years, but she would make me so fucking mad. She knew I hated her hanging out with other people especially that whore of a cousin of hers Heidi that worked for that hosh posh club. I have been there a few times, why wouldn't I the women there are fucking hot and completely fuck worthy. I admit that I had dipped my dick into Leah behind the club a few times, sure she had a rockin body, but no fucking brains, and she is a complete ditz. No Bella had brains and wit, she is so funny and I could get lost in her eyes. THATFUCKING WHORE, SHE GAVE HIM HER BODY, THAT IS MY BODY MINE MINE MINE NOT HIS! I will show her not to step out on me, I will make her pay. I will get rid of that baby and she will learn. Throwing a picture of her across the room shattering on the wall, I saw Seth staring at me through the window. Not wanting to deal with other peoples shit I drew all the blinds and curtains closed and sat and waited for the whore to come home and answer to her unfaithfulness.

While I was waiting, drinking, thinking about all the things I was going to do to Bella to make that whore pay; my thoughts drifted back to my senior year in high school.

_First down, we have twenty yards and we can get that ball in the end zone, we can own this shit. Spouting off the play to the guys, knowing we just needed one more touchdown and we will have won the homecoming game. My chest swelled with pride, my boys, bruised, some bleeding, but fucking happy and we where going to rock this game and be the home town heroes ending the school's homecoming losing streak for the past 6 years. I see the ball get snapped, I run into the end zone, and I see this huge brick shit house of a center come barreling at me. I duck, I shimmy, I sway and I catch the ball. I zigged when I should have zagged I crumple in the end zone with pain shooting through my boys that made me feel like I was going to die. I felt warm liquid oozing out my testicles when I looked down, I saw the blood. Darkness over took me. I felt my body raise and I heard the screaming the shouting, the hooting and hollering. WE WON! I woke up two days later in the ICU. I found out that the brick shit house was wearing illegal cleats and that when i fell he stepped right on my boys severing my vas deferens rendering me useless to make babies in my future. Dr Cullen told me that there was a slight chance that they could grow back and I would be able to father children. For years I jacked off into a cup and nothing. Two years ago before I met Bella I went for my annual jack off test. My doctor was surprised to find a few swimmers in there and told me that just maybe I could father children but to not hope to much. _

I was snapped out of my memories when the whore walked thru the door.

"Bella…what the fuck is this? I said very slowly to her so she was sure to hear my question.

She stared at me stunned like a deer caught in the headlights, looking like she was going to bolt from the room. I got up and walked over to her. She had the nerve to step back. I grabbed her by the neck and slammed her head and neck against the wall, got really close to her face to make sure this time that she heard me.

"I said….Fuck. Is. This?" again holding the stick close to her face, you could still smell the bitches piss all over the stick. Fucking cunt.

"A pr-pregnancy test" she stutters.

A rage that I never knew that I could feel, the pain the anger and the hurt all coursing threw my body, taking over and getting ready to live what I had been plotting all morning long while I waited for her to come home.

"YOU FUCKING WHORE!" I roared as I slammed her head into the wall again. Seeing a small crack in the wall as she crumbled to the floor. I grabbed her body as if she were a rag doll and it hit me; bitch told me she was on the pill.. ANOTHER FUCKING LIE!

_"You lied! You, stupid fucking bitch! You told me you were on the pill! You really think I'd have a kid with the likes of you? You're worthless, a nobody, the ugly duckling that no one else would ever want and this is what you do to me? I took pity on your sorry ass! No one else will ever want you..hell even I don't want you, you're just a useless waste of space! Good for cooking my meals and doing my laundry and when I'm really hard up...a quick fuck!" _I knew that I was being hateful when I told her those things, but what the fuck the bitch stepped out on me, I no longer cared.. the bitch was going to pay..the bitch owed me.

She began to beg me to not kill her, laughing at her obscured assumption I leered down at her to let her know that no she wasn't going to die, but she sure as she was cheating she would wish she was dead. I took my blade out of my pocket and showed her. She scooted across the floor, quickly grabbing her I sliced a long slow deep cut running from her shoulder all the way down past her elbow. I whisper into her ear "will he still love you when your body is no longer perfect?" Making my tongue flick her ear. She had to know that I would find out, at least hear her moaning his name. I kick her in the stomach as hard as I can, feeling bone crush beneath my foot as I was going to make sure that baby did not survive. She began to beg me, oh how I love it when she begs, she knows just how. I throw the knife down between her legs, her body heaped on the floor sobbing, crying, begging and pleading to just let her leave that she would tell no one. I saw her panties "hmm lace, I wonder if he fucked her today?"

More rage coursing pumping thru my body, I yank of her panties and smell them, I force her legs open right there on the living room floor and I slam my cock right into the whores' body. Panting and grunting as I throttle that pussy hoping to cause her as much pain in the area that is MINE, she socked me right in my temple in her futile attempts to break free from me. Shaking my head I growl out at her " you'll fucking pay for that you stupid whore." She continues to struggle and fight, punching her in the face, pinning her wrists above her head I begin to taunt her asking her what doesn't it feel good? Tears streaming down her face she closed her eyes.. " That's right Bella, close your eyes. Maybe behind those eye lids your dream man is there to save you. Is he there Bella? Is he whispering all those sweet things that you ache to hear?"

"STOP IT JAKE! JUST STOP!" she screams at me, tears coming in abundance, blood under her body, I laugh at her while I tell her all about her whore dreams and me knowing all about how she lusts after a man who will never want her. He is rich, she is poor scum. I wrap my fingers around her neck and begin to tighten my grip. I am not going to kill her even though I want to. But I know my time is limited, she made a call while she was on the floor. Charlie may be on his way, I'm not sure, but I will be dammed if I am going to go to jail for this slut. I see her pass out. I finish fucking her, slicing her body in different spots just to mar the beauty. No one will want this, she is mine, and she isn't perfection any more. MINE. I heard a car pulling into the driveway. Heidi busting into my house, I was standing off in the hall in the shadows watching that whore tend to Bella. NO that bitch needs to BLEED she OWES me. I stomped over to Heidi, and smacked her off of Bella slamming her into the wall. I grabbed her and was going to punch her in the face when she sprayed me with some fucking pepper spray. Dropping her I ran out of the house, grabbed the hose to spray out my eyes and took off into the woods behind the house.

I watched the police come, the ambulance and all my neighbors looking on like my house was something that was now a spectator sport. I had snuck into the garage grabbing my other bottles of jack, a sleeping bag and a blanket. I ran the night in my head over and over. I saw how much blood was coming from that traitor pussy, my knuckles raw and bleeding. If she dies, to fucking bad the whore should have kept her fucking legs shut. I don't regret hitting her, cutting her perfect body, making her bleed. He wont want her now. She will come back to me. She will forever be mine. I already warned her several times, that no matter where she was I would find her. I would always drag her back, that I owned her. She will never spread her legs again for another man.

Chuckling in my drunkenness I revel in the pain in my hands, seeing the blood still on my cock, taking a swipe and placing it on my tongue. I growl out that's right bitch, your blood is in my body, you are now forever mine. I stare up at the moon and let out a wild howl before passing out on my sleeping bag._  
_


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N This is a collaboration with Becky Young. Becky writes all of the female pov and I write the male. This is our first try at fan fiction so please be gentle. **

**We do not own Twilight Stephanie Myers does. We do not own Edward or Bella just this story. I hope that you all enjoy and have fun reading what our minds have joined together ****J**

** Brandi**

Tarnished Gosling  
Chapter 8 - Hidden Secrets and Smooth Moves

BPOV

I was awoken out of my afternoon nap by the sound of Heidi hovering in  
my room talking to someone on her cell phone.

I laid back and silently watched her pace back and forth speaking in  
hushed tones. She had yet to catch onto the fact that I was awake.  
"No, I'm still not sure she'll go for the idea. She hasn't said  
anything to me one way or the other." _pause_ "I know but, she has  
a lot of pride and doesn't take hand outs from anyone, not even me.  
I'll see what I can do, since it's the only solution for the time  
being." She glances in my direction noticing I'm awake. I eye her  
quizzically as she finishes her phone conversation. "Look, she's  
awake, I have to go. Right yes, see you later."

She strolls forward and seats herself at the foot of the bed. "Sooo,  
have you decided what you want to do when you get out of here?"

"No Heidi, I haven't made up my mind as of yet, but, I really don't  
have too many options at my disposal now do I? I snap.

"Listen Bella, I know you have this hatred of anyone trying to take  
care of you and doing things for you but, you're just going to have to  
fucking suck it up for once and let us help you. You don't have any  
other choice."

"Us?"

She rolls her eyes giving me the I-know-you're-not-this-dense look.  
"Edward, and I. He has the means to help you and he's willing, so  
what's the big deal? I'd offer to let you stay at my place but, with  
only having the one bedroom and the two of us soon turning into three,  
I just don't have the space or really the money to afford a bigger  
place right now. If I could do it, you know I would in a heartbeat."

"Yeah I know you would" I grumble. "I just..Heidi, you didn't tell  
Edward everything that happened did you? I mean, he was here so he  
knows I had an 'accident' of sorts but...you didn't tell him about Jake  
and the baby did you? I don't want to be a fucking charity case in his  
eyes."

"Bella, he's a very smart man. He wouldn't be as successful as he is  
without the brains to back it up. He saw you, he knows all your  
injuries weren't inflicted by one of your klutzy moves. So I highly  
doubt he thinks you just tripped and fell." I could tell that she  
wasn't telling me the whole truth by the way her eyes kept darting  
around the room and not looking directly at me as she spoke. Choosing  
to file that away to visit later when I don't have so much shit hanging  
over my head I sigh.

"Fine, seeing as I really don't have a choice in the matter. I agree  
to Edward's offer. I'll take the apartment and the job as soon as I'm  
up on my feet again - but this is only temporary. As soon as I start  
making enough to live off of, I'll find another place for the baby and  
I."

"Great!" She squeals clapping her hands and smiling brightly. _Dear  
God..remind me again why I put up with her._

"So uh" I avoid eye contact and start fiddling with a loose thread in  
the bed sheet. "What sort of work will I be doing for Edward?" Jesus,  
just thinking about working with him, seeing him everyday evokes  
feelings in me that I never knew existed. Shit, I have to keep my  
distance...he will be my boss. I'll have to keep it strictly  
professional and I'm knocked up. He won't be interested at all when I  
begin to show and he realizes I'm pregnant, hell I might even be out of  
a job then too. I'm sure those Volturi uniforms aren't at all  
flattering to the pregnant form.

"Well originally, I thought you'd make a good cocktail waitress since  
you have experience in waitressing from back when you were in school.  
But, given your 'condition' and the fact that I've put in my notice at  
Volturi you'll be taking my spot as the bartender. As soon as you're  
feeling up to it, I'll get you trained to work behind the bar."

"Wait, what? Why are you quitting? I thought you loved your job."

"I did, but, one of Edward's guys...Aro has a fucking hard on 24/7 and  
roaming hands. I'm sick of his shit! He has so many fucking  
complaints against him from other waitresses, I don't know why Edward  
just doesn't fire his ass and be rid of him. Nevertheless, if he pulls  
any shit with you, tell him to go fuck himself and report him to Edward  
immediately. I don't think you'll have to worry though. Edward will  
keep an eye on you at least for the first couple of months to make sure  
you're acclimating to the job alright so if Aro knows he's watching he  
won't try anything."

"Great, first Jake and now I have to worry about some skeevy perv  
trying to molest me at work. Can things get any better?" _Seriously  
fuck my life_.

Later that afternoon, Heidi helps me take a shower in preparation for  
my discharge. As I'm putting on the comfortable sweat suit she brought  
for me Dr. Cullen _Wait..Cullen? Wtf_? comes in with my papers and  
prescriptions.

She slowly pats my hand smiling warmly at me. "Bella dear, everything  
is in order and you're ready to go. Remember to take your medication  
as prescribed and if you need anything at all please don't hesitate to  
call me day or night. I've written my home and cell numbers down for  
you on your discharge papers."

"Thank You Dr. Cullen. I really appreciate you taking such good care  
of me." I give a half smile back at her noticing her striking green  
eyes for the first time. I've seen those eyes before. I have every  
fleck of green in those eyes memorized.

I open my mouth to ask the question that's on the tip of my  
tongue...when there's a soft knock at the door. Dr. Cullen steps  
further into the room as Heidi opens the door. My breathing hitches  
and my heart slams against my chest wall with the force of a semi truck  
at the mere sight of him. My Edward..._what? he's not YOUR anything  
well except maybe you're future boss and landlord gah Bella pull your  
head out of your ass!_

He looks at me, a small smile playing on his lips as his eyes dart over  
to Dr. Cullen. "Mom?"

"Hello son, how nice to see you. I do however wish I could have seen  
you yesterday but, you never returned my call."

"Sorry, I was busy." He shoves his hands in his pockets looking down  
at the floor.

"Hmm I see" Dr. Cullen looks back and forth between Edward and I "well  
Bella, you're free to go dear remember what I said about your  
medication and please make sure someone is with you at least for the  
next few days to give you a hand. I know your muscles are stiff and  
sore from everything and I'm sure the torture device we like to call a  
hospital bed didn't help matters either." As she moves to leave the  
room, she leans in and whispers in Edwards ear...although it's too soft  
to me to make out what she says.

As soon as the door closes behind her, Edward once again looks at me, a  
smile tugging at the corner of his beautiful mouth. "So Bella, are you  
ready to break out of here and go check out your new home?"

"S-Sure that sounds great, but, I thought Heidi was taking me home and  
staying with me for a few days."

"No can do dear cousin. If you're taking over for me at Volturi I have  
a lot of things to get in order and training manuals go through. Edward  
here was kind enough to offer to drive you home since you will be  
living in the same building and he'll be looking after your needs for  
the next couple of days as well. He's the boss so he's allowed days  
off." She laughs.

_Jesus Christ on a cracker_

"Oh..well uh okay." I sputter, completely taken aback by the change of  
events. Holy shit not only is this god of a man my neighbor, he's also  
agreed to look after me while I heal? I'm not sure if that's luck or  
not.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N This is a collaboration with Becky Young. Becky writes all of the female pov and I write the male. This is our first try at fan fiction so please be gentle. **

**We do not own Twilight Stephanie Myers does. We do not own Edward or Bella just this story. I hope that you all enjoy and have fun reading what our minds have joined together **

** Brandi**

Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 9 – Pixies and Cowboys

EPOV

Alice Brandon.. Hmmm let see she has experience both tending bar, and waitressing. Interior design degree, hmm I wonder why she is wanting to work at Volturi? That is definitely something that we need to explore. While looking over her application I notice that her height is only 5 foot even. All of our girls have been at least 5 foot 8 if not taller as some unspoken rule. I will have to put this off in the maybe pile. I look through at least a dozen more applications. One for a Bre she has limited experience with entertainment and she does meet the visual demands of this job. Being the fact that you cannot hire someone based on appearance or religion and such, when making the applications for Volturi I made sure that I had the lawyers look it over to make sure that I would never be sued for discrimination. After mulling for another two hours, my eyes keep drifting back to Ms Brandon.

Alice Brandon, 24 years old, black hair, blue eyes, five foot tall with no tattoos.. hmmm that is a good thing, but does have a piercing through her navel. Well if she has the figure then why the hell not. I say to myself. I pick up the phone and give Ms. Brandon a call.

"Hello, this is Edward Cullen owner of Volturi may I speak with Ms Alice Brandon Please?"

_Sssssqqqqquueeeeeaaalllllll_

_Did I hear a squeal? _Clearing my throat. "Ms. Brandon?"

"um yeah Hi, Mr. Cullen this is Alice." I could practically feel her vibrating through the phone.

"Ms. Brandon, I was just looking over your application, (_squeal..)_ _Did she squeal again wow I guess she really wants this job. I can't fault her on enthusiasm._ So yes Ms Brandon I was hoping that you could come down today perhaps in the next hour or so to go over your application and if you are Volturi material maybe take a look at my establishment here and go over a schedule?"

"Oh Mr. Cullen, I would love to be there. I will be there in an hour and I have to say Mr. Cullen I am really excited that you even gave my application any consideration what so ever. I am not exactly model material but….." cutting herself off midsentence before she rambled into something that was even more embarrassing.

While I waited for Alice, my thoughts traveled where they normally went when I was feeling overly stressed. My animal sanctuary. I was adding a new breeding program to help with the local wild life and those animals that are currently on the endangered species list. I decided that I was going to breed wild cats such as the Jaguar and the Cougar which are endangered in Northern America, along with the Gray wolf even though I am not particularly fond of wolves, I need to contribute. Being that my best friend has a liking for the bears of the world, I also opted for the Asiatic Black Bear that is endangered in Asia and the Brown Bear from Tibet. Just to mix it up a little I also found breeders for the Dama Gazelle and the Cheetah both indigenous to Africa. Of course I also allotted for our feathered friends as well as those of the reptilian fashion. Hmm I wonder if Ms. Brandon can decorate the visitors' center.

Alice showed up an hour later. I was immediately taken back by her brilliant smile. The shine that is in her eyes and her zeal that just radiated off her perfect skin. I took her dainty little hand into mine when she extended her arm to me.

"Mr. Cullen, I am Alice Brandon. I am here for my interview."

I was shocked to say the least. This little gem told me that she wasn't model material. Surely she jests. She is perfect, a little short but still, her skin, flawless, her eyes bright, and clear. Her smile could light up a room. Her tits, yeah well she could use a whole lot more, but I am pretty sure Rose could lift and separate them bad boys and wala, Volturi spectacular.

Ms. Brandon I ask.. Alice she immediately corrected me. _Hmmm I'm not sure I liked that_. Yes Ms Brandon you state that you have experience tending bar?

She took off like a bottle rocket, I am not sure what drugs she is on, she couldn't sit still, she radiated happy, bouncing in her seat, talking a hundred miles an hour about how she just loved serving drinks, being able to come up with fantastic new ideas. She also informed me that she was already trained in martial arts and could by herself take down a 300 pound man attacking her from behind. As she spoke I couldn't help but get swept up in her fantastic tale. She was definitely Volturi material. I am pretty sure that she is going to make an impression, let's just hope it's a good one.

I showed Alice the bar and gave her, her uniform. She frowned a little when she spotted the short shorts but otherwise was pretty happy with what she had to do so far. I explained to her that Volturi gals have a reputation to uphold of firmness of their bodies as well as how they deal with the customers. _You let a drunken patron walk all over you, you're done. _I handed her, her guest pass to Gold's gym stating that if she made it past the probationary period I would then be funding her membership to the gym where she is to work out at least three days a week with our trainer Alec.

I began to introduce Alice to the others that work at Volturi that she would be around the most. Rose whom normally doesn't take to other women, warmed right up to her. Emmett gave her a bear hug that I was pretty sure going to snap her back in half. Jasper just stood there, stunned; shell shocked looking like a complete goof. His eyes glazed over, his mouth slack almost to a drool state and mute. Jasper has always been rather quiet except for when he was performing or working the door with Emmett. But this, this was just not Jasper. What the hell? Who broke Jasper?

"Jasper.. Hey man you in there?" Waving my hand in front of his face. " Yo, Jazz.. You with us, this is Alice she is our new bartender.. Dude Hello?"

Emmett decided that he need to provide a wakeup call for Jasper belting how a ear piercing whistle that would make anyone cringe. Jasper snapped out of his zoning type state, mumbled something that no one understood and then took off like a bat out of hell. Looking at Emmett, "what the hell?" Emmett shrugging his shoulders welcomed Alice again and set off to go find his broken little buddy.

Aro running into the main hall looking rather out of breath, stopping mid stride to gawk at our newest member of Volturi "hey E, there is a call for you, I think it is Heidi. " He placed a smirk on his face that made me wish that murder was legal just for making me lose my one link, and my best dam bartender. I will be dammed if he is going to get his grimmey Italian prick all over Alice and he sure as hell won't even come within a breathing distance of Bella. I spun on my heel turning to Aro before he even had a chance to talk to Alice.

"Aro, this is Alice" trying to stay calm through clenched teeth. "She is our NEW bartender, she will be taking over for HEIDI, you know HEIDI the bartender that you fucked over, the one woman that made you act and look remotely something human and not a walking scrotum. You remember her don't you ARO?"

Dropping his eyes to the floor; Aro full well knew that I was now beyond pissed off. This was my fourth bartender that he has blown thru. Sure the waitresses where needed as well but we got qualified applicants all the time, they where a dime a dozen. But women who can tend bar, look smoking hot, kick ass, and command respect and get it, yeah not a huge supply of around here. "Aro, do you remember what I told you I was going to do to you if another one of team Volturi came into my office hysterical and quitting because of your roaming dick, lack of personality, shit relationship skills and your complete inability to not FUCK your co-workers?" I shouted at Aro who was slinking back into the shadows of the main hall.

"yes Edward, but come on man, look at Heidi she is smoking hot and well she wanted to be exclusive and you know me man, I can't do that, I had to cut her lose E, please, please don't put me in uniform E I'm begging you. Fine the shit out of me, dock my pay I don't care man, but I am begging (dropping to his knees) please do not do this to me!" His dark eyes staring up at me from his knees trying to will me to not put him in the gals uniforms and out on the floor.

"Aro, I am going to fine you 2,000 payable to me by closing, also you WILL be in uniform and out on the floor for a week. Now your fine is going to pay for Ms Brandon's training here, and also the other new girl that will be coming in. I will only say this once Aro, you even think about trying to get into either of these girls pants, not only will you be fired; I will call Demetri to come deal with you!" Growling out my answer. Aro's face still white from the mention of the most feared man in our society he quickly nodded grabbed his wallet and handed me the two thousand dollars. Slinking off to the dressing room to meet his fate for the next week, Aro's eyes flashed something to me that I did not recognize.

I talked to Heidi for a little while letting her know that she was going to be training Alice and Bella at the same time. Heidi told me that she wasn't sure if Bella was going to be willing to take my offer, but that she was pushing her in that direction. She also told me that she was going to need me to pick up Bella at the hospital to take her back to the apartment. I reluctantly agreed. I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to hide all that I needed to from Bella. I knew for a fact that I needed to protect her. Would she have me, after I told her all my secrets, who I really am, my past, will she even want to talk to me. I couldn't bare her rejecting me.

JPOV

I am such a dweeb. First I stare at her like she is come kind of alien that just popped up to say hello and then I freak like a girl and run down the hall. UGGG . Who is that woman? Edward introduced her as Alice. _Alice oh what a beautiful name. _Snap out of it Whitlock, you cant think about her, you cant be with her. _But she smelled so good, and her skin oh my god flawless. Her tiny little body; ohhh to die for. I bet it would feel so soft and perfect right up against. STOP Whitlock!_ You cant have her, you can never have her. It feels as though she sings to me, my own little Alice song. "_That is IT Jasper"_ I mumbled under my own breath, I need to get the stage set up and I need to get tonight's act in order. I dove into my work trying my hardest to not think of that perfect little goddess that had the eyes of an angel that I could literally get lost in. Her hair, so dark almost ink like. Its complete disarray looked planned all the way down to every single hair and wisp. Her SMELL I cannot get over that smell. It is nothing like I have ever encountered before. So sweet, almost like honey mixed with a little orchid. It's a smell that I will never forget as long as I continue to exist. Alice will never want to be with someone like me. I have nothing to offer her really. Sure I am devastatingly good looking, but really what could I possibly give her that she cannot get from every tom dick or harry that may have more than I, or worse be more than me. I growl out in frustration looking at my watch realizing that I have less than one hour to get up on stage and perform the one song that immediately came to mind when I saw Alice, but I would wait. I cannot just go up there like some modern day Romeo thinking like I had a chance and embarrass myself on top of all the other men of Volturi with my antics. Edward did warn us that if we got tangled in with the women of Volturi we would be facing a fate that is worse than any torture that could be bestowed on any man, no matter how secure he thought he was in his sexuality. Chuckling I thought about Aro and what he was going to have to do for the next week as the newest member of Team I'm a cross dresser Volturi.

Edward came back stage to find me in my gear for the night. Tonight the club was going with a Midwestern crosses rock feel. I was excited to be able to pull out my leather chaps, my spurs for my boots, and my hat out of the top of my closet just for the theme tonight.

At nine, after all the sound checks and sneak peeks at the goddess behind the bar, I climbed up on the stage to get started on my set. I had several songs picked out for tonight, but wanting to get a little goofy I decided I was going to start out with Kid Rocks Cowboy.

I nodded to the boys to get started:

**Cowboy...cowboy...**

**Well I'm packing up my game and I'm a head out west**

**Where real women come equipped with scripts and fake breasts**

_I bet hers are very real, OH. MY. GOD STOP!_

**Find a nest in the hills chill like Flynt**

**Buy an old droptop find a spot to pimp**

**And I'm a Kid Rock it up and down your block**

**With a bottle of scotch and watch lots of crotch**

_Nope no other crotch, just hers.. WHAT. THE. FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?_

**Buy yacht with a flag sayin' chillin' the most**

**Then rock that bitch up and down the coast**

**Give a toast to the sun, drink with the stars**

**Get thrown in the mix and tossed out of bars**

**Sip the teajuna ...I wanna roam**

**Find the old town chillin' fools then come back home**

**Start an escort service, for all the right reasons**

**And set up shop at the top of four seasons**

**Kid Rock and I'm the real mccoy**

_Alice, I'm real, oh let me be your escort, I would be your slave!_ _Dam IT Jasper good thing you don't show your emotions or you would be as red as a tomato right now. Oh my god, I am sooo needing a cold shower right now. FUCK I hope no one can see the tent I'm pitching here. Oh MY GOD what if ALICE can see it. Fuck, fuck. Ok Calm down, Breath and make it through the set._

_**And I'm headin' out west sucker...because I wanna be a**_

_**Cowboy, baby**_

_**With the top let back and the sunshine shining**_

_**Cowboy baby**_

_**West coast chillin' with the Boone's Wine**_

_**I wanna be a Cowboy baby**_

_**Ridin' at night 'cause I sleep all day**_

_**Cowboy baby**_

_**I can smell a pig from a mile away**_

_Oh how true that statement is. _I begin to chuckle to myself mid musing at my own retardedness at this very moment. I cant believe how my thoughts have created a mutiny in my own mind, my thoughts no longer being able to be controlled by my ability to maintain, oh no they have to run wild and frolic like some kind of parolee just granted release. I snap myself out of my own mind to finish up the last of this song. I look out into the club and see her, she is smiling at me. Her eyes are sparkling and she is giggling. Well if I had seen anyone else up here doing what I am doing um yep I would be laughing too.

**I ain't straight outta compton I'm straight out the trailer**

**Cuss like a sailor...drink like a Mc **

**My only words of wisdom are just, "Suck My Dick."**

**I'm flickin' my Bic up and down that coast and**

**Keep on truckin' until it falls into motion**

_Oh I bet her lips would fit so nice. AHHHH STOP!_

**Cowboy**

**With the top let back and the sunshine shining**

**Cowboy**

**Spendin' all my time at Hollywood and Vine**

**Cowboy**

**Ridin' at night 'cause I sleep all day**

**Cowboy**

**I can smell a pig from a mile away**

**Cowboy**

**With the top let back and the sunshine shining**

**Cowboy**

**With the top let back and the sunshine shining**

**Cowboy**

I finally belted out the last word, feeling mortified by my own thoughts. Wondering where the hell these feelings are coming from. I don't even know her. Edward shot me a few glances during that. I know he knows he has always been able to read me just like a novel, then again Edward can read anyone.

I wrapped up tonight's show without any more major musings on my traitor mind thoughts, trying to avoid even looking at the bar. Dam I could use a drink. Shit, I have to go to the bar, the mini fridge back here is out of drinks.

Swallowing the giant lump in my throat that feels the size of a boulder wrapped in sand paper I make my way to the bar. I stopped dead in my tracks. Some douche is looking at my Alice. Wait what? I chastise myself and head on over to the bar to get a drink and hope and pray for whom ever maybe looking down and laughing at me , to not let me say anything stupid.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: First I want to thank all of you that have put this story on alert and or favorites list. Becky and I truly appreciate you all. For Cemyesr3 thank you for your review, Becky I love you bunches and thanks so much to you and all the ladies of TDL for so much of your love and support on this story as well as in our lives. **

**The Rec's that I have for this story are:**

**Uncomfortable Truce by Chase Corin.. This story will rock your world. It will take you to the places of the imagination that you did not even realize was there. Absolutely a must read.**

**For The Summer by Camoozle. This story is so awesome that I wait every week for its update just to watch Bella and Edward progress throughout the years.**

**As always Becky and I do not own Twilight in any shape or form, nor do we own Edward or Bella, we just love playing with them.**

Tarnished Gosling  
Chapter 10 Mixologists and MasterCard

APOV

What the hell is wrong with me? Here I am, first official night on the job and I'm standing behind the bar for all intents and purposes ignoring the customers as I silently stare at the man gracing the stage.

Jasper...Jesus Christ just thinking the man's name makes my girly parts drown in the tsunami that's currently going on in my panties. I can't quite put my finger on what it is about him that causes this  
reaction in me. Sure he's beyond gorgeous and I've seen my fair share of gorgeous men in my life but, fuck the reaction my mind and body have towards him is unlike anything I've ever experienced. The mere sight of him draws me in making me feel as though I have fire and venom boiling in my veins. It is scary but at the same time, leaving me craving more.

I really need to get my shit together and quit fawning over him before I get fired on my first night. I've only spoken to the man once for fuck sake! _Get it together Alice_ I mentally chastise myself. _He probably isn't interested in dating any of his co-workers and I'd be willing to lay bet that it's also against Volturi policy as well._(Making a mental note to go over policies, and procedures packet as soon as  
humanly possible just to be sure.)

I pull myself together enough to start banging out the drink orders again. I mindlessly mix and pour praying to god that I'm getting these drinks right as I'm more or less not paying attention to what the customers are telling me they want. Although I can't find it in me to really give a flying fuck as I continuously steal glances towards the sex god crooning away on stage.

_Cowboy huh? Cowboy hat - check, leather chaps - check, crotch less panties - check, riding crop - check. All that combined while sitting on of top Jasper? Mmmm mother fucking priceless!_ My inner bitch in heat  
squeals while running to gather said provisions all the while mentally berating her oneself for sounding like a pornographic MasterCard commercial.

As I'm having my silent conversation with my inner slut, a smarmy looking bastard saddles up to the bar. Ugh just what I fucking need, just the sight of him gives me the creeps and makes me want to hurl all over the bar top. I walk over slow and eye him warily. He simply smiles as I approach.

"Good Evening and welcome to Volturi, what can I get you to drink?" I ask, putting on my most bouncy chipper voice.

He eyes me up and down as if I'm a juicy piece of Kobe beef. "Whiskey sour and keep em comin princess."

I simply nod and get to work fixing his drink. I feel his eyes on me the entire time. It would be one thing if he was drunk but the creepy bastard just walked in! Maybe it's just my mental ESP, but, I get the  
distinct impression there is something really off with this guy. I walk back over and sit the drink in front of him fully prepared to walk away and tend to the other customers sitting at the bar.

"Hey, what's the rush princess? I did ask you to keep the drinks coming so you might want to get on the next one." He says, slamming his drink back in one gulp.

"Look buddy, I do have other patrons to take care of as well. Seeing as how I'm the only bartender tonight, I'm swamped. I can't stand here all night being your personal mixologist." I say trying to keep my voice light but unable to hide the annoyance laced in it.

"Are you sure about that? I tip really REALLY well princess." He smiles wryly cocking his head to the side.

Now, as much as I need the money, and tips hence why I'm working here. I know damn good and well these fuckers 'tips' are not of the monetary persuasion. As I open my mouth to reply I notice out of the corner of my eye Jasper walking off the stage heading towards the bar. Christ the look on his face is ferocious. Dare I say he looks down right evil. As I watch him approach, my eyes locked with his. I begin to see small flashes in my mind's eye. Almost as if I'm seeing small snippets of a movie play out but, all jumbled up like puzzle pieces laid out on the floor.

My breath hitches in my throat as the scenes play out; too short to make sense of what I'm seeing yet long enough for me to mentally beg them to stop. My eyes still locked on Jasper as the empty glass I'm  
holding tumbles to the ground and shatters. He silently stalks past me all the while glaring daggers at me and the douche bag at the bar then slams the door to the back room so hard I can feel the vibrations run  
up my spine.

At that sound, I am broken out of my trance and turn back to the whiskey sour fucker who seems oblivious to the shit that just played out and is continuing to look at me like I'm a gigantic neon pussy ripe for the taking. I huff and walk back to the bar and mix the asshole another drink, while my thoughts are on Jasper and wondering what the fuck just happened between us. Okay, yeah I get visions sometimes but never anything like the shit I just saw. What the hell was that? Also why was he looking at me like that? God, that feral look in his eyes scared the living fuck out of me but made my ovaries dance a jig all at the same time.

I sit the drink down in front of Mr. God-Knows-How-Many-STDs and lift my hand to silence him as he opens his mouth no doubt to spout more of his verbal diarrhea.

I head to the back room to get the broom and dust pan to clean up the remains of the glass I dropped. I knock but there is no answer. I open the door and walk in intent on grabbing the broom and pan quickly  
before the crowd gets too backed up at the bar. As I turn to make my exit, I notice Jasper sitting on the couch in the corner of the room looking just as menacing as he did moments ago.

"Oh I'm sorry; I didn't know anyone was in here. I did knock but, I guess it wasn't loud enough to hear." I sputter, still wondering why he's glaring at me like that.

He stands slowly the mask of evil never faltering from his face as he moves towards me. My inner bitch in heat is begging me to drop and spread em right here and now and my conscious mind is telling me to run for the hills. I guess I don't make a decision quick enough because before I realize it he's standing directly in front of me. Slow close that I can feel his breath on my face. He reaches out and gently takes  
the broom and dust pan from my hands, his eyes never leaving mine. It's almost as if he's silently begging me for something but, of what I have no idea. He closes his eyes for a brief moment and inhales slowly as though he's been deprived of air. He reopens them and stares at me again, this time less heated and more...resigned?

"Let me get that for you Alice. I'd really rather not see you bleeding tonight."

With that, he turns and walks back to the bar, leaving me breathless and in wonder in his wake.

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Reviews are like Jasper in tight jeans and a cowboy hat.. a must see (Alice agrees with me)!


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer:** Becky and I do not own anything Twilight. We only love to play with them as much as we please. Please see my A/N at the end of this chapter to see this chapters Rec's.**

**Brandi**

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Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 11 Fresh wounds and Fresh starts

EPOV

I waited patiently while Bella was being released from the hospital. The bruises on her face seemed to be fading, and she didn't look to be too sore from her ribs. The cut was still bandaged down her arm; it seems Bella is on the mend. Well her body anyway. I looked into her eyes the brief moment that she looked at me. I saw the vacancy, a hollow shell. I could tell she wasn't happy about this situation so I tried my best to relieve the four hundred pound elephant that was sucking up all the oxygen in the room.

"_Bella" I said quietly_

"_Yes, Edward?" She replied._

"_Thank you for taking me up on this offer. I know that this situation is really hard for you, and I really do wish that you did not have to go through all of this, but I have a feeling things are going to get a whole lot better for you from now on."_ I said wringing my hands, wondering what the hell is wrong with me. This isn't me, I'm Edward Cullen; owner of Volturi the hottest night club around. I am strong, fast, and confident. Not shy weak and vulnerable. Bella is just a girl _"who are you kidding hot shot?" _OK scratch that, she is more than just a girl, she is the woman of my dreams, the one whom I want to spend the rest of my life with, I can't shake thinking about her, the way she smiles, or smells "_oh my god her smell_" her fighting for what she believes in. She is my everything. I will however not let her know that, I cannot. First I must make her safe "_apartment ready to go. Check"_ then, oh who am I kidding she isn't going to want me. "_sigh_"

I loaded Bella and all her get well soon gifts into my Volvo, slid into the driver seat feeling more nervous than death row inmate wanting a stay of execution. I flipped through my IPod and turned on my favorite rock playlist, knowing I would soon be able to get lost in the lyrics of someone who can put words to their feelings better than I can at this moment. Driving to the apartment, I stole glances of Bella, watching her, her aroma filling my car, her nervous shifting and she is seriously going to kill me if she doesn't stop biting that bottom lip. Ugg my problems are big enough that I don't need to add a nice tent that is so hard and large that a family of five could camp under it. Think unpleasant things. _Ummm Jazz in thong underwear tipping his hat at me.. ACK that did it! Note to self; thank Jazz but don't tell him why._ I begin to think about I am going to approach being in Bella's life other than her boss, and her landlord, I want her to see me as a man, a man that could love her "_Love doesn't happen to men like you"_ I run my hand through my hair that is an obvious mess, and think to myself _"Love may not happen to men like me, but I can love her from a distance, I have for years, that doesn't have to change right? I can still love her and make her smile and her not know or reject me right?" _At that moment, Operation Heal My Gosling launched into a full scale attack, grinning to myself knowing that I could do things to make her head whirl with pleasure, fun and delight and that is without laying a single hand on her. Although touching, kissing, feeling "_CULLEN!"_

We pulled up to the apartment building; turning to her I noticed her looking down and so unsure.

"_Bella" I said taking my finger lifting her chin to look at me._

"_You have nothing to fear here. I have state of the art security, alarms throughout your apartment, a panic button in several rooms being your bedroom and the bathroom as well as in the kitchen. There is plenty of room for you to roam around the complex when you feel up to taking a stroll outside, and a gym that you have to have the code to get into. Only myself and a few others that live here in the building has that code, so you can work out or go for a swim in the pool with no fear ok Bella? I promised Heidi that I would keep you safe; far from harm and help you get on your own two feet Bella. I understand that what you have been through has been extremely painful both physically and emotionally. I would love to help you Bella, be here for you no matter what you need. I am a great listener and I would really love to hear your story. I won't push you to talk to me Bella ok, just know that I am here for you and when you're ready you can talk to me, no matter what it is about. I have a strange obsession with wanting to know what the weather is outside"_

A tiny giggle slipped her beautiful lips and she nodded her head. I starred at her hoping and praying to anyone who would listen that those tears that threatened to make haste down her cheeks wouldn't slip and fall. A few tears began to streak her beautiful blushed cheeks that I quickly took away with my thumb.

" Come on Bella, let's get you into your new home."

I gathered all of Bella's gifts, flowers, and balloons and headed up the walk to the where we were going to be living for hopefully was going to be in my mind forever. I got to the door and unlocked it. I quickly punched in the code and handed Bella the keys, I hope she doesn't realize the meaning of the code that I set for the alarm.

"Bella, you have forty five seconds from the time that you enter the door to come over here and punch in the number 072208, the alarm will then disarm and you will see this green light ok." Biting her lip she quietly nods her head while staring at the floors. I walk into the kitchen that is off to the left after you walk into the entry way and I heard a small gasp.

"Bella are you ok?"

I turn to her and see the tears welling in her eyes as she surveys the kitchen. She walks over and runs her hand across the granite tops of the bar. Pivoting on her left foot she sees the stainless steel refrigerator and stove. The oak cabinets, that are nicely veneered and the window above the sink that looks out facing the St. Louis Arch.

"Edward" she whispers so faint that I can barely hear her. She spins around to face me, tears running down her face, her eyes turning red and swollen. "I can't possibly take this, this kitchen alone is worth more than I have ever made at any job I have ever had, and I haven't even seen the rest of the place. Don't get me wrong Edward, this kitchen is a dream, I love to cook and there is so much space, but this, this is more than I can possibly accept."

I place my finger upon her lips silencing her silly rant. "Bella!" I spit out almost with contempt. Fear crosses her face and she begins to step deeper into the kitchen.

Shit Cullen send out reinforcements cause you just FUCKED UP! You cannot talk to gosling this way. NOPE she was just released from the hospital from the clutches of an animal.

I soften my look, tilt my head, and flash a smile; I try again, even though this woman has just insulted my generosity stating she doesn't deserve nice things.

"Bella, listen, I understand that this may look like something that you normally could not afford, but I assure you. One, this property here is paid off, which affords me the ability to offer it to you at next to nothing rent. Two, not only do you deserve this; I want you to know you deserve this. I don't know exactly what happened to you Bella but trust me when I say that you deserve to feel safe, you deserve to feel like this is your home, and you deserve this to be your home. Understand?" Looking at her, wishing I could take her pain and place it somewhere that is deserving of this kind of pain. I slowly grab her hand and I begin to show her the rest of her new home. She marvels at the view, and the wooden floors beneath her feet. More tears make their appearance when she enters the bathroom.

"Edward is that a Jacuzzi tub in my bathroom? " She asks with a smile so wide, and bright, had I not known the cause I would have sworn that the sun had descended in the bathroom and lit it up for all to see. I nod my head yes as she bolts over to get a closer look.

"For all that is green and holy Edward, this tub is huge. You can fit at least five people in here. "She states.

Feeling very proud, having been the one that caused my gosling to shine, even if for a few minutes over something as simple as a bath tub, I begin to show her the extras that this tub has. Not all the tubs in this building have these extras, but for my gosling, I spared no expense when I replaced the tub early this morning.

"Well Bella, this tub, has the jets, that will help soothe any muscle ache that you have, when u lean back here there is a crook just for your head so you're not risking hurting your neck, and there is a heater in the walls of this tub that will help keep the water very warm. There is also a pump here that is full of bubble bath if you choose to have one, and over there is where you can keep your shampoo and other things you may need, along with a warmer. Over here on this shelf is the towel heater. Turn this on before you get in the tub, and when you get out your towel will be very warm, and snuggly" Did I just say snuggly. Yep I need to turn in my man card.

I can see the wheels turning in her mind thinking that she doesn't deserve anything that she is seeing. Obviously she believes that scum of the earth Black, that she is worthless. I see worry flash across her face, and her eyes become so distance almost like she is recalling a memory. I walk her through the rest of her new home, showing her the guest bedroom, the nice sized dining room completely with an oak table that can seat eight and of course the living room that holds all dreams of any techno geek could ever dream of. But my gosling her focus is not on the new toys that are at her fingers disposal, they are casted out across the courtyard to a patch of unclaimed earth that I have yet to done anything with.

"Edward", she says her body turning toward me, but her eyes glued to the plot of dirt. "What are you going to put there?"

"I haven't decided yet Bella, what do you have in mind?" I ask her closing our distance, seeing my opportunity to smell her delicious strawberry scent, mixed with the scent of Bella that I crave so deeply in my soul, which I know now I will never be able to live without. She is quickly becoming essential in my ability to live, but also testing every limit I have ever set for myself. I know that she will be horrified when she learns of all the truths that have made me who I am today, the real question is, will still want me in her life then?

I see her shoulders begin to shake and a loud sob tears from her chest, as she begins to tell me about her mother Renee.

"_My mother died when I was just nine years old. She was on a flight with her new husband Phil who played baseball at the time. The team was hosting a double header and the entire team had already left earlier that day. Well with Renee being Renee, she had convinced Phil to just fly out with the flight only taking three hours and the bus ride with the team taking seven. During the flight she had told Phil that she had a really bad headache. He got her some Tylenol and she took it with a shot of vodka. She never woke up. The doctors said that she had an aneurism. Apparently several months prior to that day, she had been trying how to learn how to wind surf, Renee was always trying new things. Well she had fallen off the board, a wave took the board and it knocked her in the head. She never lost consciousness but the doctors told my dad that it was enough to start a very slow bleed. Being in the air and the different pressures and all that caused everything to accelerate and she basically bled out in her brain while she slept." _

"Oh Gos..Bella I am so sorry." I brought her in for a hug feeling her cheeks pressed against my chest, and my arms wrapped around her tiny little torso while she wept. She pulled back from me, making a quick swipe with the back of her hand to clear away the tears, wincing under the pain from the bruises that are still not all healed on her face.

"My mother loved all kinds of flowers. Lilies where her absolute favorite. She always found a way to plant a whole bunch no matter where she lived. So Edward do you mind if I plant some flowers over there on that mound of dirt?"

"Sure Bella, if that will make you happy, you can plant a garden, roses, a tree or a bush as long as it helps you call here home, you do it ok?" I lightly kiss the top of her head, and rub her back.

Our morning quickly led into the evening. I wanted to make sure that Bella was comfortable so I had told Emmett to make sure that he introduces himself to her the second that he got home tonight before his shift so she didn't freak out about a huge burly man cruising through the courtyard. I was able to talk Bella into letting me order some Chinese for dinner.

There was a knock at the door and I grabbed my wallet from my back pocket with the intentions of getting rid of the delivery boy before he had any chance of catching a glimpse of Bella. The fewer people that know where gosling is living the safer she is. I finally got her to take a shower once I showed her that she had two shower heads and the tiles where all heated so she would never be cold. I think the two shower heads is what sold the idea. Chuckling to myself at the look on her sweet face when I said two shower heads was absolutely adorable. She is so easy to please. How could anyone want to hurt someone so precious is just beyond my own comprehension.

Emmett in all his loudness, as soon as I opened up the door .

"What's up E? Where is that fine little lady that is now one of my neighbors?"

"She is in the shower Em, and for Christ sake do you have to be so fucking loud?"

"oooo E, and early evening romp, huh buddy?" waggling his eyebrows at me.

"No, you GOON she has been in the hospital for a little over a week, remember she is the one that Black went all ape on?"

"Ahh, right I remember, I heard Heidi talking about that douche nozzle the other night, has he been caught man?"

Dropping my head into my hand and sighing out loud, I look up at one of the men that I could trust my very life with.

"Not yet, Em we have to do something about this. I am not going to go into any details, not here and not now, but I will tell you Em, if anything and I mean anything happens to that woman that is in that shower, I swear to you if Black ever touches a single hair on her head he will wish that his parents had never even met in order to fuck to become more than wet dream that resulted in his birth instead of being a stain on his mothers ass cheek from having to sleep in the wet spot." I spat with conviction.

"Whoa slow down there E, I will help you hunt this piece of shit down man, but fuck dude…"

A knock at the door signaling the arrival of dinner snapped me out of all the torture scenes that my mind had playing on a loop of the things that I so wish I could do to Jacob Black. He will wish that he had never ever touched her. I paid the kid that delivered dinner, went into the kitchen sitting all the bags down.

Bella came out of her bedroom with a strange look in her eyes.

"Bella are you ok? Did you enjoy your shower?" I ask while pulling out two plates from the cabinet.

Instead of answering me, she looked dead at Emmett.

"Edward, who is this?"

"Oh shit, gos..Bella, I'm sorry this is Emmett. He lives here in the building right next door to you, and he also is one of the bouncers at Volturi."

She looks up at Emmett and extends her arm giving him her hand.

"Very nice to meet you Emmett, I am looking forward to working with you."

"It is my pleasure to meet you too Bella, I hope that E here has been a good boy and helping you get comfortable here?"

Bella giggled and walked back to the bar. Taking a chair she looked at me, again with a really strange look. I really wish I knew what was going on in her mind. I haven't been able to get a read on her ever. In all the times no matter how brief our meeting, I have never been able to crack the puzzle of the mind of Bella Swan

"Well you two, I am gonna bounce, I have some weights to lift before I head over to Volturi. E, are you coming in tonight? Ya know Aro is going to try to not be in uniform if you are not there to keep his ass in check?"

"No, Em, I am not going to be in tonight, I already gave Jasper instructions on what to do to Aro if he doesn't comply. But hey, check in with me in a few hours will ya and if he is being his usual cock sucking self, then I will come down for a few minutes to deal with him ok."

"Sure thing E."

I sat down with Bella to eat dinner. I grabbed a bottle out of my pocket, snagged a pill and popped it swallowing without any water.

"what are you taking Edward?"

Not realizing that she was watching me, I cleared my throat.

"Um, well I have a problem digesting food, I lack the ability to create pepsin in my stomach which helps break down and digest food. My father Carlisle has been able to create this enzyme so I am not confined to a liquid diet so to speak." Giving her a small smile, we ate dinner in relative silence.

After dinner I quickly cleaned up the dishes and walked into the living room to give Bella her medication. She hadn't taken any of her pain pills since we left the hospital she was bound to be hurting by now. I saw Bella suffering in silence as I handed her the pain pills my mother sent home with her.

"Bella, you have had a really long day, and you are still healing, you should go to bed. I will be right across the hall if you need anything. I also programmed my number into your cell which is on the counter in the kitchen ok. "

"Thank you Edward, that is very nice of you. Thank you so much for taking care of me today. Don't worry I am sure a good night's sleep and more time in that wonderful shower I will be right as rain. Ok, no need to go hover, I will be fine."

"Ok Bella."

I go back to my apartment with a nagging feeling that gosling may have heard some of my conversation with Emmett, but I am not positive. Shit she is going think I am a caveman or some shit. I stroll into my study and decide to get some work done. I grab my phone and quickly fire off a text to gosling reminding her to set her alarm. Having gosling across the hall is going to be harder than I thought.

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**A/N: First I want to thank all of you that have read up to this point so far. Those of you that have put Tarnished on alert and have left a review Becky and I thank you, you really are the best.**

**This Chapters rec's are:**

**Almost Doesnt Count by Mrs. Robward.. This story is Amazing.. I read it in a straight shot and it owned me the entire time. The Opposite POV Horseshoes and Handgrandes is just as equally awesome. I do sent a tissue warning when reading this story, the emotion that is involved when reading this is super intense. Had me blubbering like a 4 year old who lost her woobie. A definate MUST READ!**

**Uncomfortable Truce by Chase Corin. This story I can not say enough about. Chase is an amazing writer that has a never ending supply of imagination. Current chapers are numbered at 207 but it is well worth the time, and you will fall in love with each and every character. Cannon pairings are there but some are surprising along with the twists and turns that Chase offers on her tale. Another MUST READ.**

**The Hostage by Ebalways.. This woman amazes me on just how much a cliff hanger can really upset a weekend. Also the author of Near You Always, I have been in her writting clutches since midway through NYA. I marvel at her intellect and she written word inspires and truly makes the characters come alive right in your own minds eye. **

**Let's get Physical by Lalina.. this is her new story of trainerward, and wowsers is he ever HOT! Lalina also wrote The Sacrifical Lamb and The Lion and the Jackal. All three have had my utmost attention. **

**I hope that you have enjoyed Tarnished and will continue to read. Please review, let me know your thoughts. If you have any questions please PM me and I will answer. All Reviews will get a teaser.**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Sorry this took forever to get up here and yep its a short one sorry about that. Becky and I hope that you like the chapter and please dont forget to review we would love to knonw what you are thinking about our story so far.**

**We do not own anything Twilight.**

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Tarnished Gosling  
Chapter 12 - Memories and Feelings

BPOV

I used to lead such an innocent and carefree life. From the moment I had been born, I was a 'Daddy's Girl'. My father Charlie has always been the person I look up to the most and whose opinions and advice I cherish and take to heart. Suffice to say, his opinion on _Jake_ is what pretty much led me to where I am now. My dad and Jakes dad, Billy were life-long friends almost to the point of brothers. They grew uptogether which in turn led to Jake and I growing up together as well. It was never any secret in the Swan house that Charlie wanted me to be with Jacob as more than friends. I had to listen to him chatter onrelentlessly about what a wonderful boy Jake was, how any woman would be lucky to have him, how he'd make someone a great husband someday "_yeah dad, look how that turned out"_. Things between Jake and I had always been natural and easy...as easy as breathing _he_ always used to say. I always knew that I would end up with him. Our friendship progressed from kids running around playing, tugging each other's hair, skinned knees and tears to best friends who confided our deepest thoughts, secrets, fears and desires to one another. He truly was the one person I trusted the most aside from my dad. He was there for me during one of the hardest times in my life...when my mother walked out on us when I was 6 years old. He was my rock and my shoulder to cry on when I couldn't talk to Charlie for fear of him breaking down over the loss of his dear Renee. She broke my father's spirit the day she walked out of our lives and he's never been the same since. Even after she died, it was like Renee took a piece of him with her to grave. I am sure that Charlie viewed Renee as his soul mate, the one that would last, beat the odds, not become another statistic. Renee's out going attitude was always the one thing that he loved and hated the most about her. Charlie always said her free spirit could never be contained by swan feathers.

Standing under the hot spray of the shower I shake the thoughts of my father and Jake out of my head, and slowly the tension in my neck and shoulders begins to dissipate. Jesus H Chris, what a week this has been. If someone had told me even a month ago that my life would turn into what it has I would have laughed in their face and asked what the hell they were smoking. This is not me; I was not supposed to end up like this. I'm intelligent, funny, and loyal to a fault and I see the good in everything and everyone. God damn it if that son of a bitch didn't rob me of all of that. Now I'm just a shell of the bright eyed girl who had everything going for her.

As I finish washing my hair I notice my bandages starting to become too wet and decide to turn off my inner musings for the night. Standing in front of the vanity mirror changing the bandage on my arm I hear a loud grumbling voice that startles me until I remember the Edward's here. I tip-toe to the door and crack it open silently so I can hear what's going on. _Yes I'm nosy._

I can barely make out what's being said as the voices have more hushed tones now.

_"No, you GOON she has been in the hospital for a little over a week, remember she is the one that Black went all ape on?"_

Wait, is that Edward's voice? And how the fuck does he know about Jake?

"Ahh, right I remember, I heard Heidi talking about that douche nozzle the other night, has he been caught man?

_Fucking hell, it figures Heidi would be running her mouth. I love her and all but the bitch seriously doesn't know when to shut the hell up._

"Not yet, Em we have to do something about this. I am not going to go into any details, not here and not now, but I will tell you Em, if anything and I mean anything happens to that woman that is in thatshower, I swear to you if Black ever touches a single hair on her head he will wish that his parents had never even met in order to fuck to become more than a wet dream that resulted in his birth instead of being a stain on his mothers ass cheek from having to sleep in the wet spot."

Holy shit...am I in the fucking twilight zone here or what? How in the hell does he know all of this and why is he being so protective? Why is Edward Cullen being all kinds of Possessive? FUCK!

"_Whoa slow down there E, I will help you hunt this piece of shit down man, but fuck dude…"_  
I make my way into my bathroom after Edward left to get some more of my pain medication, taking one more than what was recommended, since that shit will knock me flat on my ass. I stretch as best I can and notice that I'm not nearly as stiff and sore as I have been this past week. I decide to head down and check out what will soon be my new garden.

Hunt him down? What the hell are they? Vigilante Renegades? Hmm, not that I wouldn't mind seeing that cock sucking motherfucker get what's coming to him.

After that initial meeting with Emmett my new neighbor and co-worker, and dinner with Edward. I found myself sitting alone in my new apartment pissed the hell off because I had been too damn afraid to voice any of my questions while he was here. I mean fuck, I should have just asked everything I wanted to know right? It is my apartment after all. I have a right to know what's going on in my own home.

Yes, but you were eves dropping on a conversation you shouldn't have heard.

So what? I could always say I overheard because I opened the bathroom door to let the steam out. Right?

Riiiight

Even though it's twilight now and close to dark, I slowly walk around imagining all the flowers I'll soon be able to plant while getting lost in my thoughts. There's just enough light left for me to imagine where everything will go and I'm excited for the first time over two years, since the first time I met...Edward.


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: Becky and I do not own Twilight in any shape or form, as much as we would love it..sigh.. A/N with this weeks story recs at the end of the chapter.**

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Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 13 – Sunshine and Sticky Notes

EPOV

After pacing my home office for seemed like an eternity, I decided that I need to clear my head. The lines where starting to blur. I knew in my mind that I wanted Bella, I knew in heart that I wanted Bella, and lord knows that my body ached for her. Would that be enough? Would she be willing for fight for me for us if there could ever be us_? _

I walked into the hall and heard Bella's phone beep, I am guessing she still hasn't read my text that I sent to remind her to set the alarm on her apartment. I really hope that she isn't going to become careless and think that she not take basic safety precautions. I mean for crying out loud the mother fucker hasn't even been spotted in over a week, no one knows where Jacob Black has disappeared to. I knew from hearing about him that he was very much the Boy Scout in being able to hide in the wilderness and blend as if he was a part of the scenery. I rounded the corner getting ready to step into the court yard heading over to the gym since pressing some weight always helped me focus. This is all it has ever done. My strength has been stated as exceptional and amazing by those who didn't really know me or about my life. I have always loved to run which I can go for miles upon miles, never feeling winded or tired. I loved the feeling of the pain searing through my muscles, the sweat that would run down my body and glisten off my back. The few rare occasions that I have had Heidi with me while I worked out she always said that I sparkled when my body hit the sunlight. She understood all those things about me that made me who I am today. I touched my upper forearm to gauge my temperature and decided that I would definitely need to get some sun. I loved being able to bask in the sunlight, absorbing the rays into my body, feeling my body warm, my blood flow. Heidi has always laughed at my ability to never burn, nor tan. I call it a blessing. Having witnessed some of the third degree burns that have graced Heidi's body from over exposure to the sun, I knew I never wanted to deal with that crap.

With the morning sun starting to hit its peak, I see Bella slumped over near the mound of dirt that she wanted to use to plant flowers for her mother. I quicken my pace and hope that she is ok. I drop my towel next to the chaise lounge that is in the middle of the courtyard and bolt to Bella's side. I hear her mumbling something.

"_Jacob…. Please… no don't." _my body flashes with anger as I realize that my gosling has been asleep outside all night by herself and is now reliving that day he hurt her.

I drop to my knees, carefully push the hair off her forehead with my fingers and whisper to her in hopes of easing her dreams and bringing her peace.

"_Shhh Bella it is ok, no one is going to hurt you anymore. I swear to you Gosling, I will never let anything happen to you. You are my life now."_ I scoop her tiny frame into my arms and head back into the building, finding my resolve that I will stand against all and fight for her. I know that rules, I know the danger and I know that as I simply stated and felt, this tiny little woman who has turned my world upside down for years, who has shaken me to my core, my very being is in fact my life. I need her to breathe, I need her to live, I need her period.

Making it to her door without her even realizing she has been moved from the dirt mound, I noticed that not only is the alarm not set, but she didn't lock her door either. I quietly open the door; take a quick scan around the kitchen and living room while heading to her bedroom. I pull back her covers and place her gently in her bed. With expert precision and stealthness I remove her shoes, carefully tuck her feet under the covers and draw them to her chin. Stepping back by one step from the bed, I take a peek at her flat stomach knowing that there is a life that has been created out of fear, hate, and anger and not love growing in her body. I see myself, running my hands over her swollen belly, kissing it, talking to it, loving it with all that I am. If she is my life then so is that little baby. I really hope that she will let me, love her, and love her baby. I need her to tell me about this baby. I need for her to confide in me and trust me.

I quickly check every single nook and cranny in her apartment to make sure that she is indeed safe, set the alarm, lock and close the door. Once again, heading out to the courtyard to sun myself, skipping the weights and the run this morning. I angle my chair facing the sun, providing the most ample amount of sun upon myself, take off my shirt and lay down. My thoughts are all over the place, not being able to pin down one specific thought, or question that is running amuck inside my brain. Feeling the sun on my face I tip my head back and bask in the heat, bathe in the rays that are caressing my body, feeding it all that my body needs. I feel my blood to begin to flow with ease sighing in contentment I relax for a few hours to gain some perspective on what my life has become.

After sunning myself for several hours I head back into the confines of my apartment. I enjoy my solitude that I find here at my place. I enjoy all the quiet that I can obtain here. I never brought women here since I didn't want the hassles of having to ask them to leave. I have never once wanted a woman to stay. The only woman that has been here other than my mother has been Heidi. I stopped outside Bella's door and gave a slight knock hoping that she would now be awake and hoping that nightmares where no longer on her minds movie screen.

A shy and quiet voice sounded "_who is it?" _Smiling since she was finally using some safety.

"_Bella, it's me; Edward, can you open the door please?"_

"_Oh, Edward um yeah hold on."_

I heard her disarming the alarm, the locks clicking and the whoosh of the door as she swung it open. Her eyes wide and curious as to what I was doing at her door.

"_Hello Bella, how are you feeling today?" _I ask looking her body down from top to bottom. My feet of their own volition take a tiny step towards her, wanting to enter her apartment. Only stopping myself realizing she hasn't invited me in.

"_Hello Edward, I am fine, feeling a lot better thank you. Is there something that you need?" _she asks looking at me with expectant eyes.

"_Yes, there is actually. I am going to be heading over to Volturi in about an hour. I would like you to join me so I can show you around, introduce you to some of the other people that you are going to be working with and also to see Heidi so we can get started on your basic training of tending bar. I am aware that your arm still has some healing to do and therapy may be needed but the sooner we get you started, the more things will heal. I also need to know if there are any other health issues that I should be aware of. I want to be able to adjust your schedule to allow for any appointments that you may have so you don't have to stress over them ok?"_

Bella's eyes dropped to the floor and she immediately became nervous and anxious, looking everywhere but in my eyes. Bella had a refusal to meet my eyes, this act alone un-nerved me to no end. I know that her telling me about that night and the baby is going to be hard for her; I know that she has no clue as to the depth of my feelings for her. How can I make her feel more secure and want to tell me about her baby? She is going to need an OB to take care of her; I know my parents can recommend one to her that will take excellent care of her.

"_Bella; Will you go to Volturi with me in an hour?" _I ask taking my fingers and raising her chin so her eyes will meet mine. I need to see her; I need to see those deep rich brown pools of heaven that are her eyes.

"_Sure Edward, I will go. Let me get ready. Knock when it is time to go ok?" _She simply stated with a look of trepidation.

Pulling into the parking lot of Volturi I notice that pretty much everyone that works for me is inside. I know that my gosling has become a timid little mouse since that night. This is something that I will have to fix right away. Drunken assholes will eat my gosling alive if she continues to be so shy. Sitting in my seat I turn to her, looking at her in her eyes to say;

"_Bella, I know that you are gun shy so to speak when it comes to talking to people right now, and you have every right to be. So I am going to ask you right now if you think that you can handle being a bartender for me. Are you going to be able to speak your mind, command respect and hold your ground against some of these assholes that come in here at night?"_

"_What happens if I say no Edward?" _Her sad and empty eyes beginning to brim with tears

_Fuck_

"_Bella, if you do not think that you can handle tending bar right now then I am sure that I can find something in the club that you can do, that will make you comfortable."_ My tone being matter of fact, I am not going to let her slip through my fingers and let her hide from me, her issues or her past. I won't do it, he broke her and I am going to fix her.

"_Do you think I can handle it? I mean I know you don't really know me, but do you think I have what it takes to be a Volturi girl Edward?" _Her eyes showing me all the self doubt that is present in her mind, feeling her anguish that is now taking a hold of her sense of self, feeding on her insecurities.

"_Bella, first of all, you are most definitely Volturi material. You are beautiful, you are smart, and you are witty. I have seen how feisty you can be when you argue with Heidi, and I have no doubt in my mind that if one of these jerks attempts to give you shit that you have all the ability and more to tell them where to go, how to get there, by which mode of transportation and how many times they can stop for gas on their way to going to hell."_

"_You think I am beautiful?" _She asks with shock rolling off her tongue.

Grabbing the handle to my car door, I look up at her and simply state.

"_Of course i do Bella." _I walk around the car and open the door for her, extending my hand to her hoping that she will take it so I can feel that pulse of electric current that pulses through my body whenever she is near me. Chuckling to myself at the look on her face being of shock and bewilderment at what I had simply stated as a fact not an opinion. She truly doesn't understand exactly how beautiful she truly is. Not only is she beautiful on the outside, but inside of her as well.

I keep a grip on her hand as we walk into Volturi, I head straight over to the bar where Heidi, Jazz, Emmett, Rose and our newest member Alice are standing having what looks like to be a rather interesting conversation. The closer I get I hear them debating on which of the Guitar Hero games are the best, offering up challenges to each other in an attempt to be crowned the ultimate rock star. Little do they know that I Edward Cullen King of the plastic guitar controllers shall never be bumped from my throne and forever shall be hailed King, the ultimate rock star!

With a shit eating grin on my face I walk up to the group.

"_Ladies, Em, Jazz how are you today?" _

"_Oh hey E, we were just discussing how we are going to take down Rose, Heidi and this little pixie here at the next Guitar Hero battle we have, which is at your place right?" _Says Em with a giant smile full well knowing that he and Jazz both live in my building and we use the rec room when it is my turn.

"_Rec room as always Em, Everyone I want to introduce you all to the newest member of the team, this is Bella and she will be our new bartender as soon as Heidi here gets her up and ready to rock and roll." _

A unison hello was given to Bella. I turned to look at her to see how she would handle the attention that she was getting full well knowing that she did not like having people focus on her. The cutest blush crept from her neck to her cheeks.

"_Hey everyone, I hope that I don't let you all down, I am really a quick learner so it shouldn't take Heidi all that long to get me ready." _Bella states quietly.

"_Em, Jazz can you both meet me in my office I have a few things that I would like to talk to you two about, Rose, I need you to get Bella her uniform, Heidi I would appreciate you giving Bella the tour and show her where she is going to be working at night also show her the paperwork that she will need to fill out every night also the health insurance forms that she needs to fill out. I think that should be a good start today and we will go from there. Does that sound good?_ Not waiting for an answer I turn and leave heading toward my office to wait for Jasper and Emmett to join me.

With their normal knock and open, both Emmett and Jasper where standing in my office.

"_OK guys here is the deal, that woman down there has been beaten by Jacob Black, he worked her over nearly killed her and she is also pregnant. However, you are not to let her know that we know this. The only reason why I am telling you two this is because I need your help in keeping her safe here as well at that complex. Emmett if you can keep an eye out fo_r her wh_ile she is in the courtyard while you s_un that would be great. Jasper when she is in the gym I expect you to help her work out and keep her calm. With this baby she cannot have any _stress what so ever. I do not want her under any duress at all. While she is here at night, I expect both of you to keep Aro away from her, I will also be reassigning his stupid ass at night so he won't be such a bar leech. You both know exactly how I feel about men who beat up on women. As soon as we can Jasper I need you to start looking in the woods for Black. I am asking you to NOT do anything, I want Black for myself. Emmett I want you to call Jenks and find out everything that you can about Jacob from the time that he was conceived till the time he went into hiding, I want all his financials, what he owns, where his haunts are everything I want to know other than being a piece of shit that beats women, what his role in this world is. Are we clear?"_

"_Sure Edward, but seriously man, why are you going all out for this chick, man I mean in all the time that we have known you, you have never really given two shits about any woman other than those who are a part of the team and few one nighters here and there. What has got you all twisted three ways from Sunday about this one? Why do you give two shits about Bella?" Jasper asks crossing his arms over his chest, glaring down at me._

"_Shit Jazz, I don't know, ever since I met her two years ago, I have been haunted by her. Her eyes, her smile, and oh my god her smell, have you smelled her dude, my god it is the most divine smell I have ever had the pleasure of experiencing. Every time I am around her all I can think about it how I want to be with her, love her, smell her, and over all protect her. When I have touched her, there is this like pulse of electricity that shoots through my body. Man I can't explain this shit, all I know is that I know this is what I need to do and I need your help are you in or not?" _With pleading eyes I look up at Jasper, seeing the sympathy that is in his eyes. He knows this feeling I am experiencing.

"_Edward, I fully support your reasons for wanting to protect her. Do I need to go over all the dangers of why you shouldn't get involved with this woman?" _

"_No Jazz you don't, I am not a child. I am fully aware of the limitations that are there. However, if you felt what I am feeling and something tells me that you do, I can see it, would you let a few limitations stop you from whom you want to love, and protect?"_

"_No Edward I wouldn't and I don't expect you to either. I have a feeling that you are going to find a way to be with this woman. I am just trying to make sure that she is truly worth all that you are putting on the line brother."_

"_Without a doubt Jazz, she is more than worth it. If she where to ask me for the moon, I would find a way to lasso it and drag it to her, just to see her smile." I state with a sigh feeling completely emasculated for being so head over heels for a woman that I may or may not be able to obtain as mine._

Watching the conversation unfold Emmett begins to laugh.

"_Dam E I have never seen you so gaga over a girl before man, dude you got it bad."_

"_Yeah I do, Em, her safety means everything to me, you got it bro, and nothing can happen to her. Heidi said that Jacob never gives up, that he will hunt her down and try to drag her back to finish her off. I can't let that ever come to pass guys. She owns my heart and doesn't even know it"_

I stand up and go to the window that looks down on the bar watching Bella laugh with Heidi. I begin to think of a future with my gosling and how I can make sure that she is always safe, protected and happy.

A frantic knock at my office door snaps me from my fantasy of the future.

Rose is standing in my doorway breathing heavily.

"_Ed.. Ed.. Shit (_gasping for air)_ Eddie, you need to come out to the parking lot quick someone fucked up your Volvo._

I run out into the parking lot to see my beautiful baby demolished. Her windshield smashed and dents all over my hood. Anger courses through my veins setting my adrenaline on a complete rush. I clench my fists when I see that there is a sticky note stuck to the hood of my car. Walking over to my car to see what the sticky note says, Bella runs up behind me. I reach across the hood and grab the lone sticky note while Bella is peering around my shoulder. Bella takes one look at the writing on the note and gasps in fear. Looking at the lone sticky note with a single word that makes my body pulsate in complete hatred as I think of all possible ways to hurt whomever left me this message. The single little sticky note with just one single word scrawled upon it.

_**MINE**_

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A/N: First I want to thank all of the new readers that have put this story on Alert this week or added us to their favorites, you truly are appreciated. Second for those of you that left a review Becky and I thank you will all of out hearts you are the best. Third For those who have not reviewed yet, please take the time to let Becky and I know what you think of our story, your words help us push forward in our idea of this story and help fuel the desire to continue to post.

This Chapers Recs:

This is a repeat rec which will continue since it is just that awesome.. Uncomfortable Truce by Chase Corin. This story is simply amazing. She updated just the other day and of course left me hanging AGAIN.. lol you rock Chase your story truly owns my ass.

A Woman Scorned by Bella Baby 24 is also a great read, its an awesome getting even story..loved it and waiting for the update.

For those of you that are in love with Badassward, this one will set you on fire.. A pound of Flesh by Jaxon22

Thank you for reading and reviewing we will see you again next chapter.

Brandi :)

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	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: First, I want to say that yes this is supposed to be Becky's chapter, however, due to computer issues we decided to not make you wait any longer for an update, we both know how frustrating it gets when you are at an intense part and bam, no updates for a long time. So with that said this is a Jacob pov, I do warn you this is intense, and it is dark. For anyone that may have been in this type of abusive relationship understand we are not intending to set off any triggers that some may have ot mock any hardship that some may have encountered. For those who may be invovled in a relationship that is abusive, please seek help and please keep safe.**

**Second: Becky and I would like to thank all of you who have reviewed, we have really enjoyed reading them and answering them. Thank you to those who have put this story on alert and in their favorites, it really truly does make our hearts swell knowing that you are enjoying this story as much as we are enjoying writing it. I will list the recs at the end of the chapter..enjoy**

**Disclaimer: Becky and I own nothing that is twilight.. sigh yes it is true we are not stephanie meyer in disguise.**

Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 14 – One two Cullen I'm coming for you

Jacob POV

I have been sitting and watching her now for several days. I waited until the freak show spectacular was finished at my house before going in two nights later in order to shower and get fresh clothing and a bite to eat. I couldn't let those pigs get a hold of me after what I did to Bella; I will never see the light of day after the smack down that I laid on that cheating whore. I sat in the shadows and I waited, and I waited some more. I made sure to watch very closely as to who came in and out of Bella's room. Of course that bitch of a cousin Heidi was there, and lone and behold who do I see strutting into my girls room but Edward fuckin Cullen, the rat bastard. He is the reason all of this has happened. True that whore spread her legs for him, but it was him, him who told her that he wanted her body and that it was ok to give her body to him. I am going to make him pay for taking her away from me, after the whore pays of course, and their devil spawn that is in her stomach. Edward must have super sperm or some shit for that baby to still be alive. I have been able to dazzle a few of the lackey nurses on Bella's floor to tell me what is going on with her, if she is going to be released, if the seed of chucky is still alive. Of course it is, that is my luck. I couldn't just be able to kill that fucking little rodent and get my Bella back, nooo she still had to be tainted by Edward Cullen and his super sperm.

The other day I heard Esme Cullen talking to Carlisle Cullen expressing how she fears that Bella will not rebound from this abuse mentally in the near future since she was so unwilling to talk about what has happened to her.

"_Carlisle, you saw her chart, you know her injuries but you did not see the fear in her eyes, that poor child is so distraught over what happened that she hasn't even fully recognized that she was only saved by the grace of a higher power. She is so worried about her baby. I tried talking to her but she will not open up to me. _"States Esme in almost a panic stricken voice.

"_Esme dear, give Bella some time to absorb what has happened. She has always been such a strong woman, and so stubborn, you have heard all the stories that Charlie has told about her. How even a broken leg wouldn't stop her from doing what she had to do, only by force of me and several other doctors where we able to convince her that hobbling around with a broken bone was not going to aid her in saving humanity. I am sure that once Bella leaves the hospital and has a chance to take in all that has happened, resolved herself to the fact that Mr. Black has gone certifiably insane, and that she is going to be a single mother raising their child that he is convinced belongs to our son, which is laughable when you think about it. These two have never been alone together. Edward is aware that he has limitations that will hinder a true relationship with this woman, I just wish that Mr. Black was not so pig headed and listened to her before he tried to kill her." Sighs Carlisle, rubbing small soothing circles on Esme's back_

.

Are these two people insane, of course that baby is not mine, I can no longer father children, um hello cleat to the nut sack, ended that dream years ago. Of course they don't think that their perfect son can knock up someone else's girl, he is to perfect for that. Well I will prove that little hooligan in her stomach isn't mine. I will demand a paternity test to prove what a whore she is. I will even force the small time paper here to publish that shit to prove the towns golden boy isn't so golden that the towns' sweetheart is a lying cheating whore who is knocked up with another man's baby.

Knowing that Bella was due to be released from the hospital by noon that day I took back to the safety within the canopy of trees that lined the main highways. Again not wanting to be seen by the towns finest (giggle snort) which could really disrupt my plans on what I have in store for these two. Bella will lose that baby, Edward will lose his life and I am going to be the man that brings them all down.

Since that ass chunk drives like his hair is on fire all the time, I wasn't able to see where they went and where he was taking my woman. So I decided to back track a bit and stake out his dam club. That man is a workaholic there is no way that Bella is going to be able to keep him away from looking at all that free ass and tits that he has parading around in there night after night. Edward may be many things and a man is one of them. Hell Bella couldn't keep me from that club. I nailed many of their bimbos in the back alley. Leah being my last lay.

"_Come out back with me Leah, I need you baby. God you smell so good and oh god your tits they are so heavenly I just got to have them baby come on, come out back with me so I can get a little taste."_

"_Jacob, you have a girlfriend, I cannot go out back with you just so you can put your paws all over me, unless I know for a fact that you are going to get rid of that tramp and realize that I am the better woman here and that I know what your needs are that that I can fulfill all those needs, if you just let me Jacob, I can be the woman that you want and need all the time. I even cook" _Leah states with hope in her eyes looking at Jacob with longing in her eyes.

"_Sure baby, I will get rid of that whore, whatever you want sugar, just come out back with me, let me make you feel good. No one will miss you on the floor; look around no one has even noticed that you have left your station."_

_I took Leah out into the back alley knowing that I never had any intentions of following through on anything that I said other than getting in her pants, and maybe keeping her on the side. Like Leah could in any way shape or form measure up to my Bella. Bella has a brain, this nit has silicone and fake Prada heals trying to be something she will never be. I pushed her up against the cold, wet brick wall with her face against the unforgiving stone, pulled up her tiny little uniform shirt to feel her fake tits. Kicking her legs apart to gain access to overly used pussy, I pull down the tiny piece of fabric that Aro calls shorts and forcefully ram my dick into her. Sure she serves a purpose at the moment of getting my dick wet, her pussy is warm and inviting, but entirely too loose. Nope she will never measure up to Bella. Bella's pussy is always so tight, wet, hot. It grasps my cock like a tiny hand meant to stroke it just for me. Leah will never be that, ever. _

Shaking myself from the memory of Leah, I hear Cullen pulling into the lot at Volturi. I knew that fucker couldn't stay away. I watch to see what he is going to do, is he alone? No of course he isn't, he brought her here to show off his prize. What a cock licker.

I watched as gentleman of the year briskly went around the front of the car and opened her door, extending his hand to her to help her out of the car. I saw her exit the car and was immediately struck by how beautiful she is, even still with the faint bruises that I could still make out around her eyes, and along her chin. I could also see the outline of my fingers still wrapped around her tiny frail neck. Grinning like the smug ass bastard that I am, I recalled how great it felt to have her flesh under my fingers. I remembered how exhilarating it felt to feel the pulse in her neck quicken with each squeeze of my fingers, watching the fear flash across her eyes, and make its way down her face turning into a quaking quagmire of fright that was ripping through her petite body.

Watching as he guided her into the club. I began to plot out how I was going to start by making Cullen pay for taking what is mine. I had clear definition of my ownership of Isabella. I was her first. I took her virginity. She gave me her body willingly; she wanted me to possess her to her very soul. She told me as much the night I took her.

_Jacob, I want you to be my first. I want to be able to lose myself in your deep brown eyes, feel your muscular bronze arms wrapped around me. I want for you to take my body Jake; I want to belong to you in every imaginable way possible. I want to feel you move inside of me, feel your cock quake with the tremors from coming so forcefully in me that I see the stars and the moon as if they where only a finger tip reach away. _

_I laid Bella down on my bed with the utmost care and tenderness that I could find, even amazing myself without sweet and endearing I was being. Taking her virginity has been a goal of mine, sure I loved Bella, but feeling that tiny barrier give way with the tip of my cock made my body ache with want and desire. I kissed her reverently along her collarbone, licking up to her ear taking her ear lobe into my mouth gently sucking running my tongue along the edge. Her breathe hitching and a moan that was so sultry that my dick instantly became even more hard if that was even possible. I felt my head swell, my shaft expand and the skin stretch, the burn, ache and desire coursing through my blood wanting to dive deep into the cavern walls of Bella's pussy. I hear her whisper my name begging me to please stop teasing her and to make love to her, to take her, to make her mine in all ways. I lined myself up with her dripping went cunt and slid the head in just a little, having to restrain myself from just pushing with such force that I would seriously damage her. Her walls gave way making room for my cock as I pushed deeper into her, her muscles wrapping around my cock like a sleeve of pure pussy heaven. I looked into her eyes when the tip of my cock hit her barrier. A slight grin upon my lips knowing that I was the first and only to claim this pussy as mine, climbing mount Bella was no easy task, that bitch could wait out the most patient monks. With a forceful thrust of my hips I felt her virginity lose its hold as the blood from her hymen encased my cock. I should have waited for the pain to subside, but I had accomplished my goal, I took her virginity, I claimed this pussy as mine therefore it would not matter if she was uncomfortable anymore, she couldn't stop me now. I picked up my pace a little driving my hips into her hips and crashing my cock into my newly claimed piece of land. I saw tears falling from her eyes and I told her to stop crying it wasn't going to hurt forever and that she needed to get used to feeling my cock, because now I was at home. Replaying the breaking of her barrier in my head over and over again while I continued to pound into Bella worked me into such a frenzy that I came with the force of a thousand angry wolves full after a hunt to last a lifetime. I collapsed on Bella, my body slick with sweat, my heart pounding in my chest, and my breath gasping and erratic. I rolled off of Bella and grabbed a cigarette and my bottle of Jack. I gave her a kiss on the forehead and told her thank you as I walked into the bathroom to grab my shorts I had left on the floor that morning. I knew it wasn't how she envisioned losing her virginity, but she needed to know now that I was not some mushy gushy pansy ass boyfriend that was going to pamper her or treat her like some princess that can do no wrong. Fuck that, my Bella would be taught how to act right, how to please my cock, and to take my direction without any of the lip she gives everyone else. _

Smiling to myself thinking about how my piece of property would soon again be mine writing up under my body, I grabbed my bat and got closer to Edwards car. The closer I got the angrier I became. I was seeing full on red by the time I got to the bumper of his perfect little car. I swung the bat behind my head and brought it down upon his windshield, hearing the glass crack but not shatter. It felt good to release this rage on something that everyone knows is his precious little baby. Hell I'm sure he loves his car more than he even cares for this club or any of the whores he has working his jock. I swung again and again, smashing the windshield, glass giving way and crumbling onto the dash. I then began to swing at the hood, denting it, marring the paint, taking its perfect form and turning it into a slab of scrap metal within a few short swings. Working my way around the sides of the car; obliterating the windows, buckling the side panels and destroying his love, like he had tainted mine, taking what was mine, adulterating the body that was mine completely and wholly. He didn't deserve Bella, or this car to sully with his golden boy routine. I took a sharpie marker out of my back pocket and grabbed the post it notes that I saw in the back seat of his now desecrated Volvo. I wrote a simple word to define this moment that was so clearly colossal in my eyes and stuck it to what was left of the windshield. I strolled through the parking lot grinning ear to ear with pride at the destruction and havoc that I was going to bring down on his miserable life. Looking over my shoulder to view my handy work, I see the word that said it all.

**MINE**

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**A/N : This chapters Rec's**

**Some of these stories have owned Becky and I over the past couple of weeks. I hope you enjoy them as well. Let each author know that dinkadot sent u over there.**

**Osa Bella. By MYG. This story is OOC, This story gripped me from the get go. Bella is a school counselor who encounters the Cullens. She is taken back by how much she is attracted to the young 17 year old adopted kids. She has no idea that her life will be turned upside down and twisted every which way once she opens her mind and her heart.**

**Million Dollar Baby - Written by CLPSuperstar.. Renee has a heart condition, Bella must sell herself into slavery in order to pay her medical costs. Both Edward and Bella frustrated the hell out of me in this story, but it is so well written and snark from Bella is really funny. dickward really makes you want to smack him, then kiss him all over lol.**

**Uncomfortable Truce by Chase Corin - of course this is a constant Rec for me. We love the story, and we love the writter. I am always super excited to see a new chapter post and love even more that it is not ending any time soon :)**

**wingman- ninapolitan - Edward and Jacob are thick as theives in this story. I wasnt sure how I was going to enjoy that but it works really well. There is a lot of humor and the writting is awesome. **

**Just Wait - by instantkarmagirl- this story is an emotional rollercoaster. Both Bella and Edward are teens; both dealing with pasts that are very tramatizing, you cant help but feel, and love these two. You heart aches for Edward and you gasp at Bellas revelations. Every chapter makes me want more.**

**Do not hesitate to send me a message if you have any questions. Please review it helps keep us motivated to post quicker.**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N This is Becky...co-author of Tarnish Gosling . I wanted to pop in on this chapter. I am very thankfull for all the reviews so far. I'd like to see a discussion going...banter back and forth, ask questions, come up with your own crazy conclusions...whatever you wish. My main question is...has anyone picked up onany clues thus far in the story? If so..what and what do you make of said clues? My sweetie Eva, you asked about the date of the alarm code to the apartments. Yes, that is a clue...great eye Eva and what I want to know is what you think it means? Those of you that know us on a personal level willknow that nothing is as it seems. There are major twists and turns yet tocome and I truly hope you all enjoy them as we enjoy creating them. Please be aware that this chapter will be BPOV ENJOY!**

**This is Brandi - I would like to thank all of our new readers that have shown up this past week, and to those of you who have reviewed, they where awesome and it really does help get us motivated to see what kind of wicked things we can think up next. As par usual at the end of this chapter I will post up this chapters Rec's for stories that are just well plain awesome.**

**Disclaimer: Becky and I do not own twilight. SM owns *sigh***

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Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 15 - Revelations

BPOV

I stood beside Edward shaking from the inside out as I stared aghast at the mangled piece of metal that was once Edward's car. I cannot believe this is happening. I should have known Jacob would not let me go so easily but, to be stalking me? How the hell is it that he knows where I am and has obviously been watching me yet no one has seen hide or hair of him since the night he put me in the hospital?

I chance a look at Edward who is standing still as a statue by my side. I would be worried he was in some sort of state of shock were it not for pure fire blazing in his eyes and the fury rolling off of his form in waves. I slowly reach out touching his hand which is balled tightly in a fist when I notice a small piece of paper crumpled in his hand.

"_Edward?" I whisper. "What does the note say?"_

He doesn't answer and remains locked in his heated stance. I grab his fist and pry the note from between his fingers. _**MINE**_. I gasp as I feel a wave nausea overtake me which in turn snaps Edward from his trance. He places his arm protectively around my shoulders and we turn to go back inside Volturi. Edward stops momentarily at the door frantically whispering to Emmett and Jasper who both take off like bats out of hell.

As we make our way upstairs where the offices are located I bolt out of Edward's arms and rush to the bathroom where I violently relieve my stomach of its contents. I'm not sure if its morning sickness or the fact that Jake is still after me that makes me vomit. More than likely though, it's a combination of both. As I sit on the bathroom floor resting my forehead against the cool tile wall my emotions finally overtake me and I begin to sob uncontrollably. Jesus, he's really not going to give up. He won't stop until he's made good on his promise to kill me. Now he's even involving the people around me with the destruction of Edward's car. What will be next? Him burning down the club so I no longer have a job, thus destroying Edward's livelihood in the process since he's under the impression he and I have some sort of relationship going on or at the very least that we've had an affair. Yes, Jake would use any means necessary to hurt Edward because he thinks in turn that it would hurt me. Being completely honest with myself, it would destroy me if anything happened to him. What about Heidi? Jake has known her just as long as he's known me; would he try to hurt her too? Yes, that sadistic fucker would. After what he did to me, the woman he claimed to love with all his heart, I no longer put anything passed him. He will do whatever it takes to complete his goal which is my demise and he will destroy anyone who gets in his way including and especially the people I care about.

I'm pulled from my inner musings by a knock on the bathroom door. _"Bella?"_ The sound of Edwards soft velvet voice soothes the pain in my heart albeit temporarily as I'm certain Jacob Black will reappear again when I least expect it. I slowly stand, a sharp pain shooting up my leg from the attack and from having sat so long in a weird position on the floor. I look in the mirror and quickly swipe my hands across my red puffy eyes and splash some cold water on my face. I open the door hoping Edward won't be able to tell I've been crying. Not the best way to start a new job by turning into a basket case in front of your boss.

"_Are you alright?"_ Edward asks with a bit of uncertainty in his voice.

"_Well, aside from a deranged ex-b…person destroying your car and leaving cryptic notes, sure I'm just peachy!"_

Shit, that came out way bitchier than I intended. Edward searches my eyes looking for what, I'm not sure. His eyes harden and it's at that moment I realize he knows. Fucking Heidi and her big mouth had to go and tell everyone. I steady myself for what's to come. Fuck, he's going to fire me before I even start. He doesn't need this shit, Christ my psycho ex just demolished his car, he's going to tell me to get the fuck out and find another job. This type of drama would be really bad for his business. Crap, back to square one again Swan. I think to myself.

Edward leads me down the hall to his office and ushers me to a chair in front of his desk. Sitting behind his desk he sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. Shit fuck damn, here it comes…he's pissed. "_Bella, this isn't going to work out I'm sorry but I have to let you go._" I can hear it now. I decide to just make things easier for him.

"_Edward, it's okay. You don't have to say anything. I know it wouldn't be good for business if you had me working here. I'm also not stupid either. I know Heidi told you about Jake and what he did to me, and I'm positive it was him that fucked up your car."_

He looks at me as though I've grown two heads.

"_What? What are you talking about? You think I'm going to fire you?"_

"_Yeah" I shrug. "After what happened today, which will probably happening since the police can't seem to catch the bastard" I pause, taking a deep breath to keep the bile from rising in my throat again at the thought of something like this or worse happening again. "It would be better for your business, yourself and everyone that works here if I weren't around and didn't associate with any of you. It's obvious he's targeting the people I'm in contact with until he can get the one thing he wants most, which is me dead."_

"_FUCK THE BUSINESS BELLA!" _

He slams his fist down on the desk, making me recoil in the process. He notices me flinch and his eyes soften as he looks at me.

"_I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you, but, this has nothing to do with Volturi. There's a piece of shit roaming around the town that would be all too happy to end your life and you think I'm worried you'll be bad for business? Jesus Bella, what kind of a man do you think I am?"_

_Amazing, strong, compassionate, loyal….just to name a few_

When I don't respond, he reaches across the desk taking my hand in his. The heat of his touch once again radiates up my arm straight into my heart and my breathing hitches slightly.

"_Bella, let's get one thing straight. I'm not going to fire you. Not as a favor to Heidi but for you and for myself. I'm a selfish bastard Bella, and I always get what I want and what I want for now is for you to work here at Volturi."_ He smiled slightly.

_For now? What?_

"_Um well then, I accept."_ I say slightly nervous although I'm not sure why.

"_Great but, I do have one condition._" He stares at me seriously.

I fidget in the chair absorbing the weight of his stare.

"_Okay…"_

"_This is some serious shit you're in the middle of. While, I'm certain it's not your fault in any way, my car just got destroyed…next time it could be someone who gets injured. I don't give a fuck about the car, possessions can always be replaced, but people in my life however, cannot. So, for the sake of you and everyone else that works here I need you to tell me everything Bella. Do you think you can do that?"_

I blink rapidly, hoping like hell the tears stay at bay. I look in his eyes expecting to find pity, remorse, disgust take your pick but, I find none of those emotions staring back at me…only understanding, compassion and a flicker of something else I can't quite decipher.

Taking a deep breath I slowly nod my head_. "I'll try."_ From there I launch into my story about how Jacob and I grew up together, how our romantic relationship came to be and all the way through to his downward spiral which lead to the mental emotional and physical abuse he put me through and then my baby. Edward never interrupted me once but I could see the anger rising in him as he listened to my story. His hands curled into tight fists and he clinched his jaw shut. I wasn't sure if he was angry at Jake for having done all of that shit or at me for having been stupid enough to not have left the motherfucker sooner. As I finished my tale I slumped back in the chair feeling mentally and emotionally drained at having to relive that all over again.

"_Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me all of that Bella, I can't imagine the pain you endured at the hands of that asshole but, rest assured as long as I'm around he will not ever so much as breathe in your direction again."_

The conviction with which he spoke startled me. Why would he take it upon himself to protect me?

"_Edward, I can't ask you to do that. It means a lot to me that you want to keep me safe but, don't get yourself hurt just for the sake of protecting me."_

"_You aren't asking. I'm telling you. He will not touch you again Bella."_

He said, giving me a stern look that said do not challenge me on this.

I sighed knowing that was a battle I would not win and decided to let him do whatever he thought he could to help me. Hell, I couldn't help myself last time and I almost died so maybe it won't be so bad to have someone else fighting with me this time around.

"_Well, that's my entire story…unless there's anything else you want to know."_

"_There is something I don't understand about all of this. You're carrying his child. What made him go off the deep end like that? Did he not want to be a father? He's still after you, which tells me he didn't want to let you go in the first place. Why did he try to kill you Bella?_

_Fuck the ever clever one that he is decides to ask _that _question…_

As I feel my face flame to what is sure to be ten shades of red I resign myself to just be honest. I mean hell I've already told him everything else, what good is a story without a little embarrassment thrown in the mix.

"_Yeah about that….um well Jake had a football accident and was told he would not be able to father children, not that it was impossible but, that it would be very difficult, so with me being pregnant he automatically assumed that I had cheated on him and that the baby belonged to…..someone else."_

He noticed my hesitation and arched an eyebrow in my direction.

_Damn it_

I bury my eyes in the palms of my hands and say the next bit as fast as possible hoping he'll understand and not ask me to repeat it again.

"_Sometimes I talk in my sleep and according to Jake I had been saying your name quite a bit so he assumed that since I was calling your name in my sleep that you and I were/are having an affair and that the baby is yours." _

_.GOD Why did I just tell him that? Shit, he's going to think I'm some sort of pervert having dreams about him!_

I lay my forehead down on the edge of his desk to hide my telltale blush wishing the ground would just open up now and swallow me whole so I could escape this embarrassment.

Several moments tick by before he says anything. But when he does, it is not at all what I'm expecting.

"_Bella, will you look at me please."_

I groan and slowly lift my head, noticing the small smile playing on his lips as his eyes dance and twinkle brighter than I've ever seen before.

"_I dream about you too."_ He whispers.

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**A/N Ok here are this chapters Recs when you reivew their stories make sure to tell them that Becky and dinkadot sent ya.. muah**

**There Will Be Blood- by Johnnyboy7. This is Mobward, and OMG this story has owned Becky and I from the get go. Mobward is hotter than hot in this story.**

**Black Knight- Jessica Pattinson- Our dear friend wrote this awesome story. It is in the Jacob pov, please read and show her some fandom love.**

**Love Amongst the Ruins- Theladyingrey42- This story is omg sooo angsty. The chapters are long and very descriptive. This is brokenward, and he will make your heart bleed. The ending is way worth all the angst.**

**Dont forget to review, and let us know if you have spotted any of the clues that are being left for you. Please ask questions I will answer them. I try to respond to reviews as soon as they come in. **

**Thanks again for taking the time to read this.**

**Brandi ~dinkadot**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Welcome back to another chapter. Becky and I would like to thank you all that continue to read our adventure with clubward. For those of you that have taken the time to send in a review *big hugs* thank you so much it really does mean a lot that not only are u taking the time to read our story but are commenting as well. Again thanks so much. This chapter Rec will be at the end.. see ya on the other side**

**Disclaimer: Becky and I do not own twilight no matter how much we wish we do.**

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Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 16 – There is always a first time for everything

EPOV

Ever since hearing Bella tell me that she dreams of me a few months ago I have stepped up my game considerably. I knew now that there was a chance that Bella just might feel for me in the same manner that I feel for her. I have made it my goal to keep her and her baby as happy and content as possible. Our lives since that night have fallen into a routine. I have watched her belly grow; which has been absolutely amazing for me. Her once flat stomach now round with child that I so yearn to be biologically mine but I know the obstacles that we are faced with in that arena so I know that isn't a possibility. That night I sent Jasper and Emmett out into the woods to track that mother fucker. Jasper being one that is quite tactical and good at tracking was unable to pick up any sign of Black anywhere. It's like he vanished into the night. They both searched for hours, in the tree, along the dirt, tracks, scents and nothing. I pushed the anger that I was feeling as far back into the recesses of my mind so I could take care of Bella. She needed me more than ever now.

Bella was coming up on her fifth month of pregnancy and has a doctor's appointment in a few days to get her ultra sound. She claims that she doesn't care what the sex of the baby is, but at night when I watch her sleep I hear her mumble how she can't to meet her baby girl. I have really enjoyed the time that I have spent with Bella these past couple of months. It has been very hard on her since we found Jacobs love note on my window. She is always looking over her shoulder now and never likes being alone. I am not one to complain when it comes to being able to spend my nights with Bella keeping watch but it really pisses me off that she is so stressed and so scared.

There was a really bad storm moving through our area today mixed with a lot of thunder and lightning. Bella was very jumpy, and skittish. An explosive crack of thunder shook the building causing Bella to scream when the lightning flashed making the lights flicker then go out. My Gosling was instantly in my arms shaking like a leaf in a wind storm. She did her best to stay strong but I could hear the fear in her voice, her pulse racing, her breath heavy, her eyes wild and frantic. I wrap my arms around her engulfing her in an Edward security blanket pulling her head to my chest hoping my arms will be enough for her, to provide that sense of security that she so badly needed at that point.

Kissing the top of her head I whisper to her while scooping her up into my arms to take her to the couch.

"_Shhhh love, it is ok, you are safe. No one is going to hurt you here. I have got you right here in my arms. No one can touch you, or do anything to your baby. I have got you; I won't let anything happen to you."_

Rocking Bella back and forth I continue whispering words of friendly sentiment that meant so much more to me, words of safety and calmness. I finally feel her body begin to relax, her breathing take on an even rhythm and her sobs begin to cease. I smile into her hair and take in all the smells that are Bella. The strawberry essence of her shampoo, that mingles so delicately with her own unique smell of Bella in her hair. The smell of lavender that dances on her skin from her body wash making her skin so soft and succulent that I can't help myself and want to taste it on my tongue.

Feeling Bella stir under my arms, I ask her if she is ok. Nodding her head yes, I take a deep breath and begin the conversation that has been weighing so heavily on my mind.

"_Bella, I am wondering, are you going to want Jake in this baby's life?" _I ask with trepidation not knowing if there is some line that I may have crossed. Bella and I have become very close these past months and I want to do nothing to jeopardize this with her.

"_Edward, I really don't know, I mean. Um he is so mean, and abusive, arrogant, cocky and he is the epitome of all that is evil to me. I really do not want him around my baby ever, but, does she deserve to know who her daddy is, how she came to be? Should I tell her these things Edward, that she wasn't conceived out of love, but of hate, and anger and rage, and how he denied even being her father?"_

"_Bella" _I replied while taking her feet into my lap, sliding off her sock and began rubbing her right foot. She has been having issues with swelling so far and her feet are always hurting her. I don't make her wear heels at the club and I make sure that Alice makes her sit down on the stool for most of her shift just running the register so she isn't on her feet to much. I have even managed to show her that sodium reduction in her diet is a good thing. Looking into my lap while I continue to rub the sole of her tender swollen foot, I begin to speak hoping that she doesn't kick me out of her life.

"_I know that it is not my place to really even have a say about your baby. I am sure that you know that over these past couple of months I have really grown to like you so much, that I cannot even bare to think about that ingrate being able to come anywhere near you or your baby. I know that you're scared about doing it on your own, being both the mom and the dad to your baby, but if you let me Bella I will help you, I will babysit, I will even change some diapers if you want me to. I know that you are going to be a wonderful mother and I know that you will show your baby every day how much he or she is loved and how blessed you feel just to be able to be his or her mom. Bella will you let me help you? Will you let me help shoulder some of the stress for you, please, I want to be there for you any way that I possibly can Bella, and will you think about it please?"_

Looking back up into her eyes hoping not to see anger, or disgust at my ramblings, I see unshed tears, and a slight smile that dons her lips.

"_Edward, I would be so lucky to have you help me, you_ are the sweetest, most kind and generous man that I have ever known. For you to offer to be a male figure in my bab_y's life even though you hold no relation to her, for me is just amazing. The thought of you not being around after she gets here just..no it is to much for me to even think about, but to be such a great dear sweet friend that you are, I would love for you to help me, I don't have to think about it. You don't even have to ask, I thought that you just knew that even though I have no right, that I would need you even more and it is so selfish of me to need you in my life Edward, it is cause of this Jake thing, and you have the club, and hell I haven't even seen you go out on a date once since I moved in here, since I am always gobbling up your time, you shouldn't have to place your life on hold for me it is not fair for me to hoard all your time, it isn't, so yes I would love your help, but I demand that you at least find a date tonight and go have some fun."_

A smile is plastered across my face as my plans that I have made are suddenly coming to fruition. I place the sock back on her foot, and place it back on the couch cushion. I shake my head slightly realizing that this beautiful woman, this goddess has not a clue how much I really do love her.

Love.

Yes love her, I do I am head over heels in love with Bella Swan and I am dam happy about it. I turn my head back to her and say.

"_Your right Bella, I haven't been out on a date in months, but you're wrong about me putting my life on hold. I am here because I want to be here. You do not hoard my entire time silly woman; I give it to you freely. You _are right about one thing though, I need to have some fun."

I clap my hands upon my thighs and I stand up, I walk up to where her head is on the couch. Looking into her eyes and with absolute conviction I ask

"_Bella Swan will you do me the honor of being my date this evening?"_

Bella and I agreed that I would pick her up at her door at seven on the dot. After a long shower where the hot water did nothing to ease the nerves that where racking my body, and a boner that decided that it would make an appearance just to say how happy he was with the prospects of this evening date. Having to beat him into submission, I stepped out of the shower. Looking in the mirror I decided t leave the tiny bit of scruff that was there, I remember Bella stating that she liked it when I didn't shave every day something about my leather jacket and bad boys or something. Shrugging my shoulders I went to get dressed and knocked on Bella's door exactly at seven.

I decided that I wanted to treat Bella to nice restaurant some place that I was not sure if she had already been to or not. Pulling up at the River Front located in the Millennium Hotel I knew that with the sun setting after this afternoon's storm and a view of the St. Louis Arch I was hoping that Bella would be dazzled at my choice of locations.

When we arrived at River Front Bella immediately gave me a smile that could light up all of St. Louis. I gave the host my name twice since he was too busy starring at my date in order to hear my name. Needless to say when he heard the growl that erupted from chest when I stepped in front of Bella to interrupt his view, he got the hint and promptly showed us to our table. Conversation flowed freely between Bella and I. Bella could not decide between the salmon or the chicken. I told her that whatever she ordered I would order the other and then we could share. She ordered the chicken tandoori dish with Basmati rice that had a really interesting cilantro and saffron sauce. I ordered the Grilled Salmon that came with undon noodles, some Asian vegetables with a tasty curry coconut sauce. I popped my pill when our meals arrived and promptly gave Bella a taste of my fish. It took every ounce of my being to not come on the spot when a moan from taste bud pleasure spilled from her lips.

"_I take it that the salmon is to your liking?" _I asked with a smile. A blush spreads across her face while she continues to chew the bite that I gave her.

"_That salmon is a major TBO. I have had some good fish before and lord knows that I have cooked a lot of it since that is all that Charlie, my father liked to stock our freezer with. But this salmon oh my god, it's like butter melting on my tongue, so flakey and tender. The flavor oh my god it is exploding on my tongue." _

"_Bella… um.. What is a TBO?" _I ask, flipping through my mental slang adex but coming up empty.

She chuckles, blushes looking down at her plate.

"_I'm sorry Edward, it is something that Heidi use to describe how awesome something tastes, when something is just that good, the feeling of warmth, goodness, and how delectable it i that it just sends your taste buds into a frenzy which can only be related to one other type of frenzied state. So we call it a taste bud orgasm."_

I am mystified how this woman can suddenly be so shy. They have spent a lot of time together these past few months. They have told each other some of their secrets and he has rubbed her feet and touched the skin on her back more times than he can count (ok 27 times). Yet, the word orgasm brings the most beautiful shade of red to her cheeks and neck.

"_Don't apologize Bella, that explains a lot, and making me want to dive right into this salmon and see if it will explode and send my tongue into a whirlwind of wetness and heightened sensitivity." _Smiling back at her she gasps and looks into her dinner and begins to eat her chicken.

Chuckling at her I decide to spare her and tread into a subject that is a lot more safe and comfortable. Work. We discussed Aro and how he is such a douche bag, with me making sure that he has been leaving her alone and keeping a safe distance from her. We talked about how she is starting to view Emmett like the big brother that she has never had, with all his goofy behavior and how protective he is of her while she is there, and even at home, in the court yard. She told me about her work outs with Jasper and how he has been helping her get used to all the equipment so she can work out without breaking any of it. She also expressed how her friendships with Alice and Rose have really taken her by surprise. Over all I would have to say that this evening went really well.

After dinner Bella decided that even though a nice big scoop of some ice cream would really hit the spot, she did not want to have to put in the extra time on the treadmill in order to keep off any unwanted baby weight. Thinking to myself how perfect she already looked I didn't understand how one scoop of ice cream would really tip the scale so drastically.

I opened Bella's door for her and I went to the couch to sit down while she changed into some yoga pants and her favorite tee shirt that had a grumpy duck on it with one eye open carrying a cup of coffee. She said that the duck really portrayed her in the morning. We continued to chat some more on the couch telling each other more about our parents and our families. Bella sat on the couch at the other end like she usually did when she wanted her feet rubbed and slid down till her head was resting on the arm rest. I began rubbing her feet for her inching slowly up her leg onto her calf. Silence fell upon us while I was focusing on how soft and supple her skin felt under my finger tips. I looked over at her face to see her eyes closed, her breathing deep and methodical, I also noticed that her shirt had ridden up just enough for her belly to stick out from underneath. I was struck with the need to talk to this baby. Hopefully the baby and I could come to some agreement about her mommy and how much sleep she allows her mommy to get at night ha, I guess Bella has convinced me too that her baby is a girl.

I maneuvered myself from under Bella's feet and sat on the floor right at her belly. Very lightly I touched her, the outline of what appeared to be a foot was up against her skin. I traced the outline and lightly kissed her belly. In a whisper I began to talk to Bella's baby.

"_Hey little one, I am Edward. You and I, I hope are going to become great friends one day. I don't know if you are a boy or a girl, but if you are a boy, I promise to teach you how to play catch, how frogs will really freak out girls and when your older maybe even how to get a date. If you are a girl, well I am not sure what I can teach you, but I can read to you, and hold you when you're scared. I can kiss any boo boos you get on your knees from falling in the sand if you are blessed with your mother coordination. The thing is baby; I love your mom, but shhh I haven't told her yet. I plan on being here for you and for her as long as she will have me. Your mom, she is so wonderful. She is bright and beautiful and she loves you so much already. She dreams of you constantly and worries way to much but I am not one to talk in that department, I worry about your mommy all the time cause I love her so much. She already feels so blessed to have you little one, I watch her rub her tummy and her face just glows with happiness. I can tell you this though little one, currently you are not letting mom sleep enough ok, can you try to keep the dance routines down to a minimum so it is not so hard on her, and I promise that I will pay for any dance lessons that you may want to make up for it. I better go now baby, I don't want to wake your mommy. I can't wait to meet you. I bet you will have your mommy's pretty eyes, and her cute little nose. Good night baby I love you too."_

I gently kissed Bella's belly again, lowered her shirt, and grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch. Hoping that Bella didn't hear anything that I had said to her baby since I haven't told her yet that I loved her or how deep my feelings truly run. I covered her tiny sleeping body; kissed her forehead, whispering again "I love you Bella" I slipped out the front door after turning on her alarm and locking the door behind me.

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**Ahh I just love gooey Edward..mmm...**

**Ok this chapters Recs are**

**A pound of Flesh by Jaxon22.. this story Becky and I will stop whatever it is that we are doing when it updates. Jailward, omg hot.. **

**Parachute by Kitsushel.. this one is so heart warming. I can not even put into words how awesome this story is. Bella is so kind hearted and Jack, well you cant help but love him.**

**Enjoy these stories, the authors are wonderful and the story lines are fantastic.**

**Dont forget to review!**

**Brandi**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Becky and I would like to thank each and every one of you who added this story to your favorites and your alerts last week. We hope that you are enjoying this tale and continue to read. Thank you to all of you that have reviewed it really does mean so much to us to hear what you think even if Jake is an asshole, lol. **

**Disclaimer: SM owns all things twilight, we however like to play with the characters.**

Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 17 - Something More

BPOV

As the weeks progressed, Edward and I formed a comfortable little bubble around ourselves where seemingly everything in our world was perfect. Save from us constantly looking over our shoulders for Jake, whom we had not had any run ins with since what I like to now refer to as _Volvogate_.

After the night of our wonderful date, things between Edward and I remained the same yet different. It is becoming rather frustrating trying to decipher what his intentions towards me are. After Edward's "secret" confession when he thought, I was asleep. I had hoped whatever this _thing _is between us would become clearer and more defined but I can tell Edward is still holding a lot of things back. Edward is constantly on guard keeping himself in check. I wish I could say that I was not hurt by his actions or rather lack thereof but in all honesty, it does sting. I know I am hardly in a position to entertain thoughts of romance and Edward as the proverbial Prince Charming swooping in and sweeping me off my feet. I am still emotionally and mentally recovering from the devil spawn that is Jacob Black and I am about to become a single mother. What man in his right mind would knowingly get himself involved with that kind of fucked up baggage?

Still, those sweet wonderful words he spoke to my unborn child must be true at least in part. Otherwise, why else would he say them? He said he loved me. Surely, he means only as a friend, given that he has been my constant protector and rock since the _incident_. Oh who the hell am I kidding. The man is gorgeous, stunningly so, he could have absolutely any woman his heart desired without any effort at all. There is no way he would ever see me in that capacity.

_You told him he needed to go on a date and he chose you_.

As a friend, he just did not want to see me sitting at home wasting a night away alone.

_Right, you just said it yourself Bella, he could go out on a date with anyone he wanted__.__ .And Edward decided that he would choose YOU_.

He just pities me is all? SHIT. That is it. It is nothing more than pity that he feels for me. Poor little Bella all alone and is trying to save her and her baby from the big bad wolf. Christ, and here I was thinking…

I shut off my inner monologue before I become even more depressed. Today is going to be a great day and I refuse to let anything bring me down. Today is the day of my ultrasound appointment. I hope that I will get to find out whether this little one is a boy or a girl.

I roll over and look at the clock on my nightstand. Realizing I have spent the better part of a an hour depressing the shit out of myself with my thoughts of does Edward like me or not. _For fuck sake Bella pull it together, what are you twelve_? I pull myself out of bed and trudge to the bathroom. After taking a nice warm shower, I wrap a towel around myself and begin blow-drying my hair letting it fall in nice soft waves around my shoulders.

I hear an incessant knocking at the door as I am putting the blow dryer away. I must have not heard the first hundred knocks considering how impatient they sound now.

I hurry to the door not caring that I am only in a towel. It is just Heidi. She is driving me to my doctor's appointment today.

"Yeah yeah I am coming, hold your damn horses' woman!" I grumble as I pull the door wide open.

Instead of Heidi being at my door, I am assaulted by the delicious sight of Edward. Standing there wide eyed mouth slightly agape. My heart slams into my chest and my breathing hitches slightly as stares at me unabashedly. Mere seconds pass yet it feels more like hours. Instinctively I grab the front of my towel making sure it is in fact still wrapped around me. Had it fallen to the floor I wouldn't have noticed and I am not sure I would have even cared because the way Edward was looking at me made me want to show him every part of myself, give him every part of myself.

I clear my throat, causing his eyes to snap to mine.

"Bella" he breathes.

"Edward, wha…" in a flash he was in front of me. So close, I can feel the heat from his body radiating off him in waves. Grabbing the back of my neck he pulls me to him my chest crashing against his as his mouth descends on mine. Claiming me. Owning me. All in that one moment, my world is turned on its axis and nothing exists except him and I. The kiss is like nothing I've ever experienced or ever even knew was possible. His left arm wraps protectively around my waist securing my body to his, which is a good thing because I fear without the support my knees will surely give out. His soft warm lips move in tandem with mine. Slow yet firm and passionate. A groan escapes his lips sending my overly hormonal body into overdrive as his tongue sweeps against my bottom lip. I whimper against his lips parting them giving him the access he craves. _DEAR FUCKING GOD HE TASTES INCREDIBLE! _Warm and sweet like honey with a hint of something spicy and just altogether Edwardness. The kiss intensifies as he gently pushes me against the doorframe. Yes, I am still in a towel practically in the hallway but I stopped giving a fuck the moment his lips touched mine. I wrap my arms around his neck, tugging at his hair in the process.

With a loud guttural moan Edward abruptly pulls away ending our kiss. He takes a few tentative steps back, perching himself against the other side of the door frame. I struggle to catch my breath, watching him, wondering why he stopped. I find no answers in his eyes. A myriad of emotions flicker by but all are gone too quickly for me to make sense out of any of them.

I open my mouth to speak but words fail me. There are tons of questions floating through my mind about what just happened yet my brain will not work with my mouth to let me voice any of them.

As if he senses my distress, Edward gives me a slow lazy smile, running his fingers through his hair tugging slightly on the ends. _God how I want to do that_.

"Bella, I…I don't know what came over me. It wasn't my intention to take advantage of you like that."

_Take advantage of me?_

_What?_

"Heidi called me and asked if I would escort you to your appointment today, she's tied up with other matters at the moment and couldn't make it. I hope that's okay."

"Its fine Edward but, we need to talk about what just happened here." I say.

"After your appointment Bella, get dressed or we're going to be late." He says, sufficiently bringing back the standoffish Edward that I have become accustoms to seeing all the time.

I sigh, pushing myself away from the door and head to my bedroom to dress. When I return Edward is standing at the window looking out over the garden that I have claimed as my own, but have yet to do anything with. I walk up beside him, looking out trying to spot what he is looking at, when I notice it. He is looking at a beautiful pale purple flower that has just starting to bloom, and take shape in its new home. I wonder where it came from. Last time I was in the garden there was absolutely nothing planted there.

"What's that?" I ask. Confused as to how it got there.

Edward clears his throat. "It's called Primrose." He says, barely above a whisper.

"How did it get here?" I look up into his eyes.

"Not sure. We need to go Bella. You're doctor's appointment is in 15 minutes." He says avoiding my gaze.

I make a mental note to find out more about the flower when I get home later today.

Edward ushers me down to his rental car, since the Volvo is no more. I turn to look at him as he takes up residence behind the wheel. He stares straight ahead gripping the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles are white. He looks almost angry and I cannot help but wonder if that anger is towards me, because of what took place in my apartment moments ago.

"Edward, please don't be angry with me about what happened. I know we kind of got carried away back there but….." I trail off as I notice him running his fingers through his hair yet again.

"I am not angry with you Bella, I am angry at myself. I should have had better control. That kiss should have never happened." He says continuing to stare straight ahead not giving away any emotions in the process.

Hurt and rejection wash over me in crashing waves. He did not enjoy it. He did not feel anything like what I felt during that kiss. I turn my body towards to door, looking out the window hoping to shield myself from his view and hoping like fuck the tears that are threatening to spill forth stay at bay. A lone tear escapes the corner of my eye trickling slowly down my cheek. I rush to wipe it away before he notices.

"Are you crying?"

_Shit._

"No" I lie.

"Bella, look at me" He asks gently.

I shake my head and continue to stare out the window at the passing trees and buildings. He sighs but says nothing else on the subject. The rest of the drive is in silence.

Moments later, we arrive at my doctor's office. I am a jumble of emotions as we walk into the waiting area. This is supposed to be a happy day yet I have other things weighing down my mind now, with that fuck awesome kiss and subsequent rejection afterwards. Thanks for that Edward.

I sign in and then take a seat next to Edward who's idly thumbing through a magazine as if he's done this sort of thing hundreds of times before, which the thought of sets me a little on edge.

Trying to think of some way to break the tension currently between us, I decide to change subjects. I lean over towards Edward and whisper, "so if everything goes as planned today, I'll get to find out the sex of the baby."

Edward raises his head, his eyes softening into glowing pools and a ghost of a smile playing against his lips.

"That's wonderful Bella. Which are you hoping the baby will be? A boy or perhaps are you having girl?" He asks giving me that crooked boyish smile that I have come to love so much. ." Edward already knowing that I already believe that I am having a girl, I know that Edward is just humoring me with his line of questioning

I feel the tension slipping away so I decide to stay on this topic with him as we wait for my name to be called.

"Well, I don't really care as long as he or scan not healthy. After everything, we have been through. I have to believe that this baby is by far one of the strongest little human beings ever." I smile. "But, I have a feeling it's a girl."

"What about names?" He asks as he gently places his hand on my belly, rubbing small circles. "Have you come up with anything yet?"

I place my hand over his rubbing circles with him. "Actually, I have." I tell him. "If it's a girl, I want to name her Rayne Renee. Rayne being because it rained so much back home when I was growing up only spelled differently and Renee after my mother."

"I think that's beautiful Bella. If it's a girl she will have a beautiful name to match her physical beauty as I am sure she'll look just like her mother."

"Thank you." I flush and lower my eyes to my tummy where our hands continue to make small soothing circles.

"And if it's a boy?" He hedges.

"I've decided that I am going to name him after the two strongest and most important men in my life." I say as my eyes capture his again. "Charles, Charlie for short after my dad and the middle name I'd like to be Edward if that's okay with you."

He stares into my eyes for a moment, just as he opens his mouth to speak.

"Isabella Swan?"

The nurse calls from the doorway. I smile at Edward and stand; turning to make my way to the exam room when I notice Edward is not behind me. I look over my shoulder and see that Edward is still sitting there with a slightly dumbfounded expression on his face.

I fight to hide the snicker that is threatening to escape.

"Edward, would you like to come back with me? I'd feel more comfortable if I didn't have to do this alone."

He stands slowly taking my hand in his as we follow the nurse back to the exam room.

"Miss Swan please lay back on the exam table for me, and could you raise your shirt up to the top of your ribs and lower your pants down to your hips."

I do as instructed thus leaving my stomach fully exposed. The nurse tucks a sterile cloth underneath my shirt and one into the waist of my pants to protect against any of the jelly from getting on my clothes.

"The tech will be in to do your ultrasound in just a moment." Nurse Amber as her ID bag states says. I thank her, as she exits the room leaving Edward and I alone.

I hold my hand out, silently beckoning him to my side. He shuffles forward almost seeming nervous and grasps my hand in his.

Taking a deep breath, I look up at Edward as he stares down at me with a look of adoration on his face.

"What?" I ask.

Taking his other hand, he brushes my hair off my shoulder. "You're so strong Bella. You and this little guy or girl are by far the strongest people I've ever seen in my life. I am in awe of the both of you. And to answer your earlier question, I'd be honored for the middle name to be Edward if it's a boy."

Stunned by his sweet words, I do not have a chance to respond. The tech takes that moment to enter the room pushing the ultrasound machine in front of him.

"Good Morning Miss Swan. Are we ready to see how baby is doing today?" He smiles looking between Edward and me.

A huge smile graces my face and I nod my head giddily, squeezing Edwards hand in the process as he chuckles at my excitement.

The tech takes a seat and proceeds to squirt that cold ass jelly on my tummy. I shiver in the process. He holds the wand down on my belly and pushes a few buttons on the machine. Within moments, I hear the most beautiful sound in the world, my baby's heartbeat as his or her image appears on the screen in front of us. I gasp as tears automatically well up in my eyes at the sight before me. Edward lifts my hand and presses a tender kiss to my knuckles while rubbing my arm soothingly. _"Perfect." _I think I hear him murmur but I cannot be certain. I am too caught up in seeing my baby.

"Everything looks excellent. Strong heartbeat looks to be right on target with weight and size for your due date. No abnormalities or problems that I can detect." The tech glances at me smiling, and then looks back to the screen.

I silently send thanks up to whoever is watching over us, that my baby is healthy and normal.

"So mom and dad, are we finding out the sex today?" The tech asks, never removing his eyes from the screen.

I gape at him for his choice of words but, I can see how he would assume that Edward is the father so I keep my mouth shut and look up at Edward, who in turn as an amused expression playing on his face. I roll my eyes at him and bring my attention back to my child.

"Yes, yes we would like to know what we're having." I tell him and glance back at Edward who again is looking at me in awe. _Oh, how I wish I had met you first Edward, then all of this could have gone a different way_. I think to myself.

"Congratulations Mommy and Daddy, you have a gorgeous healthy baby girl in here, waiting to come out and meet you." He says, grinning at the both of us widely.

With those words, I lose my hold on my tears and a sob escapes. I honestly cannot remember the last time I was this happy or if I was ever this happy to begin with.

Edward leans down, placing a kiss to my forehead. Lowering his head further, he whispers in my ear.

"See, I was right. Rayne is just as beautiful as her mother."

I look up at him and smile.

The tech cleans up my stomach and hands me several printed copies of the ultrasound along with a DVD. I give my thanks as Edward and I make our way to the exit.

Both Edward and I grinning stupidly at one another in a complete state of euphoria knowing that nothing can ruin this day. Now that I know, my little Rayne is healthy.

As we get back into the car, I power up my phone that I had previously turned off while in the doctor's office and notice that I have over 20 missed calls and several voice messages. I hit the button for my voicemail on my call. I am greeted with the frantic voice of Heidi begging me to call her as soon as possible.

I hit her speed dial number immediately; worried that something has happened to her.

"Oh Bella, Thank God! I am waiting for you at your apartment, get here as soon as you can. We have to go home, something's happened." Scan not talking so fast I am having a hard time understanding her.

"Wait! Will you calm down Heidi? What's going on?" I inquire.

"Get here now Bella! We have to leave, it's an emergency!" She yells in a hysterical voice.

"We are on the way now. Please, tell me what the fuck is going on Heidi! You're scaring me!" I beg.

Sensing my distress, Edward latches onto my hand glancing between me and the road with a worried expression on his face. I shrug and shake my head to let him know that I have no clue what is going on.

"Look, I know you were just at the doctor and you're pregnant and in no shape for stress at the moment, but Bella, there's no way to protect you from what's happened. So I am just going to tell you now. We have a flight that leaves in less than two hours. We have to go home. Charlie…" She chokes back a sob.

My heart plummets into the pit of my stomach. "What about Charlie?" I ask trying to remain calm.

"Oh God Bella…he…he's been murdered." She cries.

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**A/N : As par usual I am going to Rec Uncomfortable Truce by Chase Corin. This story is just awesome. **

**My others recs are ExJ Slash stories, If you would like some titles of some really awesome stories that have amazing plots and talents then send me a PM and I will be happy to send them to you. I would list them individually however I hate long A/N so I am not going to bug out your eyes anymore than needed lol.**

**Dont forget to review **

**Muah**

**Brandi**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: First I want to thank everyone that added this story to their alerts since the last chapter posted. Becky and I really do appreciate it. I also want to thank those of you that took the time to review, ask a few questions and banter back and forth with me. This really does get our creative juices flowing, making the next chapter show up that much faster. RL has been kicking our collective asses these past two weeks with chest colds and kids wanting to cause parental heart attacks. There is a huge warning that is going into this chapter. This chapter is very very dark. It deals with torture and murder. I understand that some of you may get really upset over what I have written in this chapter. However, it is necessary for the story line to progress and the ultimate outcome spring forth as Becky and I intend it to. Please dont forget to review, even if it isnt nice, we know they are coming.**

**Disclaimer: SM owns these characters, we just like to play with them in our own way.**

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Tarnished Gosling

Chapter 18 – M is for Murder

Jacob POV

I decided that I had to find a way to draw Bella back home. I needed her to remember all that we shared here in Washington before she decided that she wanted to be close to Heidi, and move all the way to St. Louis. I know that I could have made her stay here if I wanted to, but I really wanted to branch out in my business of graphic design. Paul assured me that he could run the main office and I could open and run the St. Louis branch. All was going great until Edward happened.

I arrived in Forks making sure that no one would be aware that I was here. The last thing that I needed right now was for the local police, more importantly Bella's dad Charlie knowing that I was here. I knew that he would attempt to put my head on a platter and serve me up without a second thought after I put Bella in the hospital.

Climbing in through Bella's window, I began to search her room looking for anything that may remind her of how happy we could once be again. Bella loved to keep everything that I have ever given her while we where dating. On her shelf, I spot the figurine that I was looking for. A Ying and Yang symbol with white feathered wings coming out the sides. I picked this up for Bella shortly after we stated dating. It was always so simple between her and I. Conversation always flowed, she always laughed at my stupid jokes, we were happy, meant to be for all eternity.

During my trip down memory lane, I did not hear Charlie come home. What I did hear was the gun that was being cocked and pointed right at my temple.

"_What are you doing in my house Jacob?" _Said Charlie in a voice so tense that I knew this was not going to end well for me. I decided right then and there that it was Charlie that was going to bring Bella home to me. I gave my best smile and turned to face Charlie.

"_Hello Charlie. A few days ago, I decided that I needed to find a way to remind Bella to whom she belongs. I decided I was going to send her a little reminder of our happier days, but now, with you being all Mr. Deputy Sherriff on me, I think I am going to change my plans slightly and you are going to remind Bella whom she belongs too." _With my evil glint in my eye, I stare down Charlie to show him I mean business. I could see the hair on his arm begin to stand with the sound of my voice and the evil in my eye.

Charlie begins to tell me that he will do no such thing, how Bella is finally happy again and smiling. How she was going to find out the sex of the baby in a few days, and how Edward is taking really good care of her. To Leave him out of my plan, and that if I know what is good for me that I will turn around, put my hands on the back of my head, and get down on my knees.

The mention of Edward takes my already boiling blood to an all-new height of angry. I no longer hear what Charlie is rambling on about, my rights this that and the other, something about a lawyer and I think he said that he was arresting me.

A cackle so evil and maniacal sounding erupts from my chest. I spin to my left, grab Charlie's wrist and twist till I hear the bones start to snap and pop. Charlie drops his gun to the floor. He immediately bends over trying to grab his gun and cradled his now shattered wrist to his waist. I scrambled to the left, grabbed the gun, and hit him on the back of the head, knocking him out instantly. With a thud to the floor and another snap of a bone, Charlie was now under my control. He would remind Bella to whom she belongs or he will suffer.

Tying Charlie to a chair in the kitchen next to the phone, I wait for Charlie to rise and shine. I ran into the backyard to his tool shed to pick up a few items that may help convince Charlie that he needs to see things my way. I grab a hacksaw, a pick, cordless drill and a staple gun. In the house, I grab a fillet knife some bamboo skewers that I know were there because of Bella since all Charlie eats is the fish he catches with my dad. I also grab a small ball ping hammer that I found in the toolbox that was sitting next to the cabinet. After grabbing a beer, popping the top, taking a long hearty pull I plot out how I am going to show Charlie that telling Bella to come home alone is in his best interest.

Charlie began to stir a little as I laid down the rest of my items on the table.

"_Wakey, wakey Charlie, you and I need to come to an understanding my dear friend. You see, your precious daughter Bella is truly a whore. See she cheated on me with Edward, and is now knocked up. Everyone knows about my accident on the football field Charlie. You and my dad know that I cannot have children, so how did Bella get pregnant? I assure you that it was not Immaculate Conception Charlie."_

"_Jake, I know my daughter. I talked to her after she found out she was pregnant. That is your baby son; think about what you are doing. She loved you with all that she had. She told me and swore up and down on her momma's grave that she did not cheat on you. She was so excited that she would be able to give you the child that you thought you were never going to have. She was also so scared about what you would do to her and the baby once you found out. She told me Jacob, she told me about all the times that you used her as a punching bag. How you would r. r. rrr rape her. She told me all of the nasty venom laced words you would spit at her. Why Jake? Why, when she did nothing but love you?_ Charlie sobbed with his head falling forward, his chin resting on his chest.

"_LIES, all of that is LIES Charlie! Bella did cheat on me, I saw her, the way she would look at Edward. She would call his name out in her sleep Charlie. Did your precious little slut of a daughter tell you that Charlie? Did she tell you how she would moan, and writhe all over OUR bed letting his name spill from her traitor lips? DID SHE CHARLIE? DID SHE?" _Smacking my hands down on the table. The items from the tool shed clanging together redirecting Charlie's attention to what was sitting in front of him.

"_Now what you are going to do is call Bella. You are going to tell her that you want to see her this weekend and for her to come home. You are going to tell her that Sue dumped your ass and you need your daughter home. Am I making myself clear Charlie?"_

"_No Jacob, I will not call Bella. I will not have her come home to where she feels safe, and sound in order for you to do God knows only what. You are sick Jake you need help. You need to get better for your baby Jake. Don't you want to be a good father Jake? Don't you want to be able to go to the park with your son and play ball, teach him how to play football Jake." _Charlie says in hopes for bringing the baby to the front of Jakes mind. In hopes of maybe, striking any fatherly cord that could be in his sick and diseased mind.

"_Tsk, tsk tsk Charlie. I am not going to fall for your psycho cop routine. I know that baby is not mine, so why would I want to teach it anything? I am going to give you one more chance Charlie to call Bella, and get her home to me. You really do not want to see what I have in mind for all these things are on the table Charlie. Do not make me hurt you." _I whisper into his ear, almost hoping that he will resist me. The visions of what I could do are making my cock twitch.

"_NO" States Charlie in a firm fatherly tone. _

"_Ok Charlie, just remember, you asked for this."_ I say feeling almost downright giddy with the thoughts of being able to torture Charlie a bit. I know he will crack. All people crack eventually. I know that Charlie loves Bella and he will do anything to keep her away from me. However, I do not think he will last all that long. I untie his broken wrist from the chair and place it on top of the kitchen table. I grab the duct tape, and start to unroll it. I place the tab of the tape right below his elbow on the inside of arm and wrap it around two times. I then drag the roll along the table, go under the table, up, and over to the other side going back over where there is already tape. I tear off the tape just past his arm. I tear off another strip to place across his arm a little bit lower. I pick up the staple gun, look him dead in the eye, and tell him again that he brought this all on himself. That all he had to do was make a simple phone call. I fire off a staple right into his index and middle finger right up against his cuticle, anchoring his fingers to the table.

Charlie screams out in pain as the stable cuts threw his nail bed, gashing his flesh and anchors him to the table. A thin layer of sweat breaks out along his brow. He can see blood beginning to seep under his fingers. Charlie's wrist swelling from the break, throbbing and pulsing almost in time with his heartbeat.

"_What do you say Charlie, ready to make a phone call?" _Jake asks in a singsong tone.

"_No, you sick bastard!" _Charlie spat. His breath heavy, his eyes looking to find any way possible to get out of his house, to seek help.

I picked up the staple gun spinning it around by the trigger on my index finger whistling.

"_Charlie, this could go so much easier. All you have to do is agree to make the call."_

"_NO!" _Charlie yells at Jake.

Lining up the staple gun with the break in Charlie's wrist, I fire off another staple. Charlie howling out in pain when the staple slices threw his flesh, scraping the bone fragments from the break. I close my eyes, letting the screams from Charlie's pain wash over me like Mozart listening to a concert. Slowly letting my eyes open, I take a quick look in the kitchen and find a dishrag to shove in Charlie's mouth. If he is going to be an ass and not make the call, I surely do not want the neighbors to disrupt all the fun I am having with Charlie.

"_Charrrrrrrllllllieeeeeee, are you ready to call your daughter yet?" _I asked again, running my finger down Charlie's arm. Swirling my index finger in the blood, making heart patterns with a J+B in the middle.

"_Jake, it does not matter what you do to me, I will not call Bella. I will not put her in danger." _Charlie huffs out with short breaths trying to manage the pain that is radiating all along his arm. Charlie's blood now is quickly running from his arm where the staple is pinning him to the table. The staple barely missed the main arterial vein in his wrist, thrown off its trajectory by a bone fragment. I grab the rag, wipe off my finger, and shove the ragt into Charlie's mouth. I then tears off a piece of duct tape and fastens it over his mouth so he cannot spit the rag out.

"_Charlie, it is almost admirable that you want to "protect" Bella and all, but really, do you really want to suffer? Do you really want to see what the sugar plum fairies are dancing to in my mind? Do you not understand what I will do to you Charlie, how I can make you scream. How I can make you bleed and not let you pass out from shock? Do you not understand that my cock is so hard right now from all of this that I am really hoping that you resist some more so I can continue to make to scream? Are you ready to make that call?" _I ask, putting my face right at eye level with Charlie, showing him the evil that is dancing around with glee and joy.

Charlie shakes his head no, clamps his eyes shut and attempts to prepare himself for what I have in store for him next.

Charlie begins to think about Bella and the baby. He really hopes that she has a girl. A girl would make Bella so happy. He cannot wait for the day when his little granddaughter races up the front porch steps just like her mother did when she was a child. He tries to imagine what her giggles will sound like when he blows raspberries on to her tiny little tummy. He wonders, what will she call me? Pop pop, papa, or granddad? Tears begin to run down his face when the reality of the situation is that he will probably never get to meet this angel. He will never hear her giggles; he will never see her smile. He knows Jake is sick enough to kill him to hurt Bella. He begins a silent prayer in his mind, praying that he make it through all this evil, that he get to see Bella again. He prays for Bella to be safe and happy. He prays for justice to be swift and just against Jake. He prays that his daughter know that he loves her truly and completely. He prays that Bella understand why he did not call her, how he could not put her in dangers path. He prays that Edward will love his baby girl, and helps raise her angel. He prays his granddaughter will never know of the pain and anguish her father has laid at her mother's feet. Charlie sets his resolve he knows that he will not break even if he dies. He whispers in his head "_I'm coming home Renee, I can't wait to see you again. I love you."_

I grab Charlie by the hair yanking his head back. I pick up the fillet knife and shows the shinny sharp blade to Charlie.

"_Charlie, you know that scalping is proof of death, more or less a statement made that yep this motherfucker is dead. Indians all over were paid for the tops of people's heads. Some tribes also used it to declare war. The taking the scalp of an enemy is quite powerful in showing the other tribe leaders that they are truly weak and can be slaughtered? What do you think Charlie, do you think I should declare war and let Edward and Bella know that I know their weak? Do you think I should send that message to them so they have no doubt in their minds that I am the one that took your scalp?"_

Fear racing through Charlie's eyes, as he shakes his head no, pleading with his muffled tongue to not do this, to let him go. His arm already numb to the pain, the blood slowing to a drip from the wound is beginning to coagulate on the table; the scent of iron from Charlie's blood hanging thick in the air.

"_Well, you are in luck Charlie, I have not decided yet. What I have decided is that you are being an ignorant fool, who must love pain. So I am going to grant you some more pain Charlie since you seem to enjoy it so much."_

I kick the leg of the chair that Charlie is sitting in, angling him out away from the table. The abrupt movement jerks his shoulder causing more pain to shoot down his arm. Charlie screams out as I bend down and begin to untie Charlie's boots. Humming a show tune while I worked, apparently, Charlie could not place by the look on his face. He feels me pulling off his boots along with his socks.

Thoughts whizzing through Charlie's mind on what Jake could possibly want to do to his feet. He turned his head to look at the table and saw all the possibilities flash before his eyes. He watched Jake pick up the bamboo skewers and the ball ping hammer. Tears freely flowing down his cheeks over the duct tape, muffled screams riddled the air while Jake took the skewers and one by one hammered them underneath the toenails of his right foot. Jake laughing with each tap of the hammer driving the skewers under his nail, watching in fascination while the skin gave way to the bamboo object forcing its entry. Charlie heard Jake mumble "beautiful" after he pressed his fingers down on top of his big toe when the skewer was rooted under the nail. Charlie lost track of time, he only remembers shaking his head no at Jake every time he was asked if was willing to make that call.

Hearing Charlie refuse my request over, and over I am beginning to get more angry, my wanting to see his blood spill by my hand. I can picture the look on Bella's face when she gets here and can see what I have done to her father. I giggle at the prospect of making her face twist in pain. I am hoping that I can cause her even a tenth of the pain that she caused me by letting that son of a bitch slide his cock into her.

I grab the chair adjacent to me and prop up Charlie's feet just by the heel so his knees are completely extended. I sit down on his feet right at the ankles to pin him down; lord knows this is going to hurt really bad depending on how thick this man's bones are. I grab the drill, look Charlie dead in the eye, and begin to drill a hole through his kneecap. The material from his uniform fraying as the bit in the drill spins and spins. I apply a fair amount of pressure when I meet resistance, forcing the drill bit to drive through the bone in his knee. I hear Charlie's muted screams from behind the rag that is in his mouth. I can tell that I am pushing Charlie's limits since he is fading in and out of consciousness. The phone begins to ring.

Charlie snaps his attention to the phone when the answering machine clicks on.

Charlie hears Bella's voice, which could very well be the last time.

"_HI dad, I guess you are still at work. I have my ultra sound tomorrow. Edward is going to take me. Dad you should have heard what he said to my belly talking to the baby *sighs* well, I can gush later I guess. Give me a call dad, I love you." _The sound of the click on the machine echoes in the kitchen.

"_You heard her Charlie, she wants you to call her, she wants to gush*gag* about that fucker to you." _I spit at Charlie. Hearing her voice and _his_ name sends me further into the murderous rage that is currently coursing in my veins.

I grab the hammer and slam it down as hard as I possibly can on Charlie's other knee. His kneecap splits right down the middle with a perfect circular hole that is now holding on tight to the head of the hammer, having lodged it in his bone. Charlie blacks out from the pain.

I begin to pace around the room.

"_How can that tramp sound so fucking happy? What gives her the right to rip out my heart, toss it on the ground, STOMP on it? Then she has the audacity to think that she deserves happiness. Oh no no no no she doesn't. I will make sure that she will suffer a great amount of pain. I will not just play with Charlie, I will get Heidi, I have always hated that bitch. I will torch that club. I will destroy her fucking life, Edward, gone. That baby..GONE. Everything in her perfect little world will be owned by me. I wont kill her, no I want her to live a long life without all of those who I plain to take away."_

I grab a bucket from the shed and fill it with ice and water. I toss it on Charlie. I did not say he could go yet. We are still playing and having fun.

"_Wake up Charlie. Come back out to play. You still need to make a phone call." _

Charlie shakes his head no and looks at a picture of Bella that is on the fireplace. Tears picking up their pace while they streak down his cheeks.

I grab the pick that is about 4 inches long and very sharp. I plunge it into Charlie's shoulder right at the joint. I retract the pick and stab his shoulder again. I make a pattern along his shoulder with the pick that resembles something of a perforated edge. Charlie, whimpering, cries attempting to scream out in pain. However, he still refuses to make the call.

I become bored with our little torture game. Charlie keeps passing out and my cock is aching for release. I decide against sawing off his thumps since that will just take to much time. I take the knife and slice right down the front of his chest. I slice through the muscle to get to his sternum. Charlie no longer cries out in pain anymore. I find that very irritating and depressing really. I thought he would have enjoyed our time together. I scribble a note on a piece of paper while waiting for the blood to slow down that his flowing from Charlie's chest.

_Bella,_

_I want you to know that your dad loved our time together. All he had to do was pick up the phone and call you home. But, being the stubborn old goat that he is, well you can see what you did Bella. This is your fault. All you had to do was keep that snatch in your panties. No you couldn't do that could you WHORE. I want you to know that his blood is on your hands, although I did relish playing in it._

_Forever loving you,_

_Jake_

I grab the pick, peel back the layers of skin, tissue, and muscle, and pin the note to Charlie's chest. I decide that yep I am going to declare war. Grabbing the fillet knife, I cut all along his scalp. Taking my time and with delicate precision I remove Charlie's scalp. I run my tongue on the underside of his scalp savoring the flavor of the chief's blood. Mmmmm taste like pig.

I place his scalp in a baggie and put it in my duffle bag along with the Ying and Yang figurine. I decide to finally free my cock from its confines of my jeans, and slide down to sit on the floor. Charlie's blood is pooled on the floor looking like a crimson gold splayed along the wooden planks. I dip my hand into the blood and then grab my cock.

I tip my head back closing my eyes stroking my cock up and down reliving Charlie's playtime and mine. Over, and over again I see each slice of his flesh. I see each skewer under his nail; I shudder with happiness while I took his scalp. Stroking my length harder and faster while using Charlie's blood for lube I chase down my orgasm. After a dozen or more strokes, a moan, a gasp, and a howl I cum all over my hand, spilling my seed into the crimson sea that flows on the wooden floor.

I quickly take a shower ridding myself of the sweet blood. I am sure that I would cause quite a scene in the post office showing up covered in blood. I grab a box from Bella's closet and place Charlie's scalp on the inside. I quickly address the box to the club since that is easy to find on the internet and I still have not located where she is living yet. Fucking crafty bitch. I lock the door behind me, slide into the driver seat of my rental, and head off to the post office.

After sending Bella her special gift I begin to giggle about my playtime with Charlie and my declaration of war I placed inside the box. Just a simple post it note saying:

One, two, three, four, I hear by declare that this is WAR!

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**Thank you for taking the time to read this chapter, push the button and review. I really want to hear what you have to say about Charlie and Jacobs sick game. Do you think Jacob will be caught before anyone else falls victim to Jakes mental instability? Let me know I will answer you.**

**This chapters rec's:**

**Did they not see the writting on the wall _naelany. this story is very touching and a very difficult read. Please read the warnings before starting this O/S.**

**American Sweethearts- Ciaobella27**

**And if you want a good laugh try out I'm What? by amanda Yates. this one had me cracking up all the way. It is a Mpreg story which just made it that much more hillarious. Edward with raging hormones and temper tantrums for ice cream just cracked me up. Enjoy this one i know I did.**

**Again thank you to all of you that alert, read and review.**

**Brandi**


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